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8A Daily News – Friday, December 30, 2011 FEATURES Anxious, apprehensive attitude annoys Dear Annie: My mother lives by her- self. I have not spent a great deal of time with her, but now that she is aging, I feel guilty for not being around. Mom doesn't have any friends, and my sib- lings barely speak to her. She is a difficult woman. Mom is very neg- ative, has no interests I can't stand to be around her. How do I cope? — Trying My Best Dear Trying: Can you talk to Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar and says terrible things about everyone. She is a natural worrier. The glass is always half-empty. The only things she ever wants to talk about are other peo- ple's problems, her medical conditions and stories about her childhood that I've heard a million times. Just the thought of having to spend a little time with her makes me anxious and appre- hensive. Although counseling helped me deal with growing up in an unstable environment, it has not made things better when it comes to the stress I feel when I'm around my mother. I've told her it's difficult to deal with negative people, but she doesn't think that applies to her. If I told her outright, she would never be able to get past how much I hurt her. I know some people will say to be brutally honest, but they don't under- stand that Mom's reaction would be unhelpful. She'd obsess over it, but she wouldn't change. I love my mother, but Mom's doctor and ask him to prescribe an antidepressant for her? All those qualities that annoy you — her negativ- ity, obsessive thoughts, worrying — can indicate anxiety and depression for which medication could be enormous- ly helpful. Tell her you love her and want her to feel better. Dear Annie: I decided after 16 years of marriage to divorce my hus- band. We married young. He was a good provider and father and treated me well. We have two beautiful chil- dren and a home on the water and were financially well off. But he was also controlling and emotionally detached. After years of loneliness and depres- sion, I decided to leave him. I stayed in the marriage a lot longer than I wanted for our children, hoping my feelings would change. After various marriage seminars and two years of couples counseling, I came to realize that I was not in love with my husband and prob- ably never was. Both my husband and I come from strong Catholic backgrounds. When I announced I wanted a divorce, my hus- band's family stopped communicating with me. A mother at my daughter's school cornered me to say I should have tried harder. I once had the same mentality. Peo- ple seem to think that if you were the one who chose to walk away, you are not hurting. Annie, this pain will be with me forever. But do I regret my divorce? No. Staying in an unhappy, dysfunctional marriage would have been telling myself I don't matter. — Starting Over in N.D. Dear N.D.: Divorce is always diffi- cult and often heartbreaking. No one knows what someone else's marriage is like unless they have lived it. Dear Annie: You often tell readers to put their final wishes in writing and see that everyone has a copy. While I agree with the first part, the second isn't always a good idea. In fact, in some families it can be a disaster. I have been an estate planning attor- ney for more than 21 years. I have seen adult children bully their parents when they are unhappy with the will. Also, it is not unusual for people to execute several wills in their lifetime. If they change their mind, they don't need everyone to know each time. If there are going to be unhappy people fight- ing, it makes sense to keep copies to a minimum. I would encourage everyone to dis- cuss their family situation with an estate planning attorney. — E.R., Woodbridge, Conn. Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W.Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. Forrest Gump, Hannibal Lecter join film registry WASHINGTON (AP) — Bambi, Forrest Gump and Hannibal Lecter have at least one thing in common: Their cinematic adventures were chosen by the Library of Congress to be preserved in the world's largest archive of film, TV and sound recordings. ''The Silence of the Lambs'' (1991), a harrow- ing psychological thriller about the cannibalistic seri- al killer Lecter, and ''For- rest Gump'' (1994), starring Tom Hanks as the guileless hero who thinks ''life is like a box of chocolates,'' were critical and commercial successes that won the Academy Award for Best Picture. The animated Dis- ney classic ''Bambi'' is among the most beloved movies ever made. A majority of the 25 titles chosen this year for inclusion in the National Film Registry are lesser- known — including silent films, documentaries, avant-garde cinema and even home movies. The Library of Congress announced the selections Tuesday. The registry began in 1989 under an act of Con- gress and now includes 575 films. Its aim is not to iden- tify the best movies ever made but to preserve films with artistic, cultural or his- torical significance. Previ- ous titles chosen range from ''The Birth of a Nation'' to ''National Lampoon's Ani- mal House.'' ''Forrest Gump'' has its critical detractors but was praised for its technical achievements, including the seamless incorporation of the title character into his- torical footage. More than 2,200 films were nominated for the reg- istry this year. The National Film Preservation Board pares them down before Librarian of Congress James H. Billington makes the final selections. ''Each year, we do try to pick one of the titles that the public nominated the most, and 'Forrest Gump' was way up there on that list,'' said Stephen Leggett, pro- gram coordinator for the National Film Preservation Board. ''Everything on the list is subject to dissenting opinion.'' Staffers at the Library of Congress Packard Campus for Audio Visual Conserva- tion in Culpeper, Va., work to ensure that each title is preserved for future genera- tions, packing away original negatives or unreleased prints into the facility's massive vault and collabo- rating with other preserva- tionists, movie studios and independent filmmakers. ''These films are select- ed because of their enduring significance to American culture,'' Billington said in a statement. ''Our film her- itage must be protected because these cinematic treasures document our his- tory and culture and reflect our hopes and dreams.'' Leggett said he was pleased by the inclusion of ''The Negro Soldier,'' a 1944 documentary pro- duced by Frank Capra that was groundbreaking for its realistic and positive depic- tion of African-Americans. It became mandatory view- ing for soldiers entering the army in the latter stages of the war and was shown in commercial theaters. ''It was kind of ironic because the official Army policy at the time was still segregation. You had a film which was implicitly if not explicitly promoting inte- gration,'' he said. Films must be at least 10 years old to be considered for the registry. The oldest movies selected this year are both from 1912. ''The Cry of the Children'' is about the pre- World War I child labor reform movement, and ''A Cure for Pokeritis'' stars John Bunny, regarded as the American film industry's earliest comic superstar. ''A lot of people would argue that the humor is kind of dated,'' Leggett said of Bunny's films — mostly short domestic comedies in which he played a hen- pecked husband. ''He really was a major figure at the time. It doesn't help your reputation when people like Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton come after you.'' Chaplin's first feature, ''The Kid'' (1921), was also chosen for the registry. It was a big year for actress Sally Field, who co- starred in ''Forrest Gump.'' ''Norma Rae'' (1979), fea- turing her Oscar-winning performance as a single mother who fought to unionize a Southern textile mill, also made this year's list. Among the other titles chosen: ''The Big Heat,'' a 1953 film noir starring Glenn Ford; ''The Lost Weekend,'' Billy Wilder's Oscar-winning alcoholism drama; ''Porgy and Bess,'' starring Sidney Poitier and Dorothy Dandridge; ''Stand and Deliver,'' starring Edward James Olmos as an inspiring East Los Angeles math teacher; and John Ford's epic 1924 Western ''The Iron Horse.'' Among the lesser- known titles chosen this year, ''A Computer Animat- ed Hand'' (1972) by Pixar Animation Studios co- founder Ed Catmull was one of the earliest examples of 3D computer-generated imagery. The one-minute film shows a hand turning, opening and closing. Documentaries picked for the registry include ''Crisis: Behind a Presiden- tial Commitment,'' which focuses on Gov. George Wallace's attempt to pre- vent two African-American students from enrolling in the University of Alabama and the response of Presi- dent John F. Kennedy. ''Growing Up Female'' from 1971 was one of the first films to document the women's liberation move- ment. Memory problems aren't always sign of dementia DEAR DOCTOR K: I am in my mid-60s, and I'm worried I might be getting more forgetful than normal for my age. I function fairly well most of the time. But sometimes I'll forget something like the details of a phone con- versation I recently had. How can I know what's normal? Dr. K by Anthony L. Komaroff, M.D. DEAR READER: You sometimes forget things you didn't used to forget? Well, join the club. Each of us has more difficulty remember- ing things as we get older — it's a normal part of aging. Like thinning hair and stiffer joints, subtle memory prob- lems are common. We used to think that there were two conditions to distinguish: the normal memory problems of aging versus dementia. We now know that there is also a middle ground of weakened mental function. By this I mean a state that's worse than normal age-related problems, but not as bad as dementia from Alzheimer's disease or other brain dis- eases. This in-between state is called "mild cognitive impairment." Fortunately, mild cogni- tive impairment stays mild in many cases. Nevertheless, a person with mild cognitive impairment is about three times more likely to develop full-blown dementia than those without it. It is a risk factor for developing dementia and may be a stage on the road to dementia. For- tunately, many people who get to that stage don't keep heading down the road to full dementia. People with mild cogni- tive impairment are able to handle the tasks of day-to- day living. They may be less efficient than they used to be, but they can live indepen- dently. It surely does not sound like you have dementia. If you are not having trouble managing activities like shopping, preparing meals and paying bills, dementia is unlikely. So the question is whether your memory prob- lems are just normal aging or something else. Mild cogni- NEW ORLEANS (AP) — The actress who played pigtailed, critter-loving Elly May Clampett on ''The Beverly Hillbillies'' has set- tled her lawsuit over a Bar- bie doll that uses the charac- ter's name and likeness. Actress Donna Douglas, who lives in a Baton Rouge suburb, settled with CBS and toymaker Mattel on Tuesday. Douglas' lawsuit sought at least $75,000 from CBS Consumer Products Inc. and Mattel Inc., claim- ing they needed her approval to design the doll. Details of the settlement were confidential. ''She was happy with the result,'' said one of Douglas' tive impairment is one possibili- ty, but not the only one. Mem- ory problems can also come from something other than a brain disorder. If a patient of mine is having serious memory problems, I consider other possible caus- es. These include depres- sion, side effects from med- ications, thyroid problems, low vitamin B12, among others. Diagnosing and treat- ing these conditions can fix the memory problems. If you don't have one of these conditions, the next question is whether you have mild cognitive impairment. Your doctor may be able to get a sense of your memory and cognitive shortcomings just by speaking with you. He or she may also ask brief, standardized sets of ques- tions to assess your weak areas. The doctor also may talk to your family and friends about their percep- tions of your mental func- tion. Right now, the best tests for mild cognitive impair- ment and dementia are tests of thinking and memory per- formed by neuropsycholo- gists. New brain-imaging techniques, blood and spinal fluid tests are also under development. I predict that in the next 10 years we will develop much better tests for deter- mining if a person has mild cognitive impairment. I think we will also develop better tests for determining the risk that a person with mild cognitive impairment will go on to develop dementia. Finally, I am hopeful that treatments may be developed that slow or prevent dementia when someone is found to be at increased risk for someday getting it. (Dr. Komaroff is a physician and professor at Harvard Medical School. Go to his website to send questions and get additional information: www.AskDoctorK.com.) Settlement in Barbie doll suit attorneys, Charles von Sim- son. The doll, released in late 2010, is dressed in jeans with a rope belt. Its long, blonde hair is a curly mop with loose, long pigtails — a style that Douglas still sometimes wears. The pack- age includes a photo of her and a promotional descrip- tion of the doll names Dou- glas, the lawsuit said. CBS and Mattel said in court documents that they didn't need her OK because the network holds exclusive rights to the character. ''The matter was settled to mutual satisfaction,'' said Lori Mince, an attorney for New York-based CBS and the El Segundo, Calif., toy- maker. She said that was about all she could say under terms of the settle- ment. Spring Blooming Bulbs 50% off COMPLETE AUTO REPAIR Red Bluff Garden Center 527-0886 766 Antelope Blvd. (Next to the Fairground) All makes and models. We perform dealer recommened 30K, 60K, 90K SERVICES AT LOWER PRICES Smog Check starting at $ (most cars and pick-ups) 2595 + cert. Pass or FREE retest 527-9841 • 195 S. Main St.