Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/4610
28 UCW NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM HEATHER GRIFFITHS, Contributing Writer COMMENTS? 484-6200 ext. 222 or editor@upandcomingweekly.com Seriously, if you title your movie The Men Who Stare at Goats (93 minutes) you better plan to deliver on that promise…especially when you put The Goat on your movie poster. And for sure, deliver on that promise when, without the goats, you don't have a lot of substance behind your flash and dazzle. The plot is reminiscent of Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (which, by the way, was directed by The Clooney). To whit: Tell a true story, but dress it up with confabulation. Director Grant Heslov does an acceptable job of delivering straight-faced satirical commentary on the American military while making it impossible to know for sure where the truth ends and the lies begin. Of course, it's also possible that I, per- sonally, find the idea of a brigadier general running face first into a wall in an attempt to run through said wall strangely plausible and most other people will not experi- ence any difficulty separating the truth from the lies. Bob Williams, Ace Reporter (Ewan McGregor) is the moral center of our story and Special Forces operator Lyn Cassady (George Clooney) is his partner in lunacy. Williams and Cassady meet in Iraq, where unnecessar- ily detailed narration introduces us to a super secret none more secret Army unit from the past. The goal of this unit? Well, unit founder Bill Django (Jeff Bridges, AKA The Dude) plans to train psychic spies, "Jedi Knights," if you will, to act as warrior monks for the American military. Shouldn't a member of a super secret Army unit think twice before naming names to reporters? I consider cracking a World of Warcraft Paladin joke, but then I won- der how many people would get the reference. The seemingly endless narration takes us into the Iraq desert, just over the Kuwait border. Williams and Cassady are kidnapped for sticking their big noses where they weren't welcome, but are saved by Todd Nixon (Terminator Robert Patrick). Nixon is corporate, and while cutting in line at a gas station, he has a fight with some other corporate types. This scene is punctuated with plenty of childish bickering from the grown men wearing camouflage and carrying big guns. Into this mix is tossed plenty of creamy, narrative, top- ping. The background of one Larry Hooper (Kevin Spacey), the evil blackened heart of the psychic spy unit, is filled out. The dynamic duo can't seem to get their heads on straight, but they eventually reach a super secret none more secret base of operations headed by some of Cassady's very bestest friends. Unfortunately, when viewed as a whole the movie lacks consistent narrative flow, and seems more like an exercise in stringing surreal images together, or a student film designed to make you question your life choices. Bottom line: The voiceover narration only serves as a distraction, and the entire thing reeks of classroom technique and amateur tricks. If you like films that name check Fort Bragg, military satires, or movies that clumsily reference Star Wars, you will probably get more enjoyment of this than I did. Final note: If you plan to reference Star Wars in 90 percent of your movie scenes without making fun of how much episodes I, II and III sucked, DO NOT cast someone who was actually in the three lesser Star Wars movies. I Expected 75% More Goats than Actually Appeared The Men Who Stare at Goats (Rated R) by HEATHER GRIFFITHS THURSDAY-SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 19-22 RIDE, RIDE! A TRUE STORY FROM THE LIFE OF JOHN WESLEY THURSDAY-SATURDAY 7:30 PM, SUNDAY 4:00 PM $10 general admission seating. $5 general admission seating for groups five or more (group rate), seniors, military ID card holders, and students with a valid student ID card. Free general admission seating for Methodist University ID holders. Contact 910-630-7157 or dlwilson@methodist.edu for more information. SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 21 WESLEY WORKSHOP 9:30 AM- 5:00 PM — HENSDALE CHAPEL $25 per person: includes admission to Ride! Ride! on Saturday or Sunday. CEU Credit. For more information, contact 910-630-7157 or dlwilson@methodist.edu. TUESDAY, DECEMBER 1 CUMBERLAND COUNTY ALL-COUNTY BAND FESTIVAL 7:00 PM — REEVES AUDITORIUM Admission is Free. For more information, contact 910-630-7100 or drenshaw@methodist.edu. For more information, go to www.methodist.edu. Engage. Enrich. Empower. NOV & DEC