Up & Coming Weekly

NOVEMBER 18-24, 2009 UCW 31 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM ADVICE GODDESS Show Me the Money Shot I have a knack for finding the lowest of the low in the trash piles of human existence. Being too nice and having low self-esteem has meant that I've dated a long list of losers. The most recent loser works with me. Without my knowledge, he took photos of us having sex, and e-mailed them to men at our workplace. I'm totally embarrassed. I wanted to press charges, but miraculously, no one claims to have seen these photos — unless they don't want to humiliate me by saying so. — Mortified If a man's going to make your dream come true, it's best it isn't that one where you suddenly find yourself naked in front of everybody at work. The good news is, on the humiliation front, there's no place to go but up: Toilet paper on your shoe, tuck your skirt into your pantyhose? You're having a good day! You could consider legal action. Unlike in sexual harassment cases where somebody claims "After he said I had pretty hair, I could no longer do my job as an accountant," your experience sounds like textbook "hostile workplace." According to law prof Kingsley Browne's "Biology at Work," that's a work situation that's "permeated with sexuality or 'discriminatory intimidation, ridicule, and insult'" severe enough to change the conditions of the victim's employment and create an abusive work environment. If you talk to a lawyer, you may find that you could have a pretty good case. After all, what could the guy's defense possibly be, "I don't have a kid so I thought I'd celebrate 'Bring Your Girlfriend In A Compromising Position To Work Day'"? But, even by winning a case, do you actually win? Just by filing suit, you're probably setting yourself up for "The Streisand Effect" — which, unfortunately, doesn't mean gay men will drop everything and fly across the globe whenever you sing anywhere but the shower. The term was coined after an aerial photo of Barbra Streisand's Malibu home was one of about 12,000 included in an online database documenting coastal erosion. These still shots of land eroding weren't exactly garnering TMZ-style traffic — until Babs filed a $10 million lawsuit against the photographer to get the shot of her house removed, driving more than 420,000 people to view it in a single month. In other words, even by talking with co- workers about what happened, you could end up, well...making a mountain out of a thigh mole. Try to remember that the maggot who did this to you is the one who's gotten naked in the ugliest way — exposing himself as somebody who gets off on doing violence to a girl's reputation. What happened, was he no longer getting the same thrill out of Xeroxing his butt? Barenaked Saturday didn't show up on Bagel Monday because you're "too nice," but because you're too willing to accept losers as your lot in life. Having low self-esteem isn't the problem, either — it's having it and not doing a damn thing about it. You can have a nice guy in your life — if you develop yourself into a person who feels she deserves it, and actually demands it. In the meantime, hold your head high. Time will pass, and eventually, feeling naked at the office will once again mean knowing that they can all see you forgot to wear earrings — not that you forgot to make an appointment at the waxer. Amy Alkon WEEKLY HOROSCOPE THIS WEEK in the STARS www.Astrology-101.com ARIES - March 21 thru April 20 Good aspects from your ruling planet Mars to your "Good times" sector indicates romance for some Rams, new ways to cash in on your abilities for others. TAURUS - April 21 thru May 21 Favorable vibes with your "signifi cant other". Also for the signing of contracts. A good time to meet new people who share your interests. GEMINI - May 22 thru June 21. Familiar faces in local places may further projects you have started. An "acre of diamonds" may be right under your feet if you dig a little deeper. CANCER - June 22 thru July 23 Domestic improvements and real estate opportunities from good aspects to your Home sector. Also a favorable time to launch a new enterprise. LEO - July 24 thru August 23 Something benefi cial re: your job should happen soon. Current business trends may be down for some but not for positive thinkers and doers. VIRGO - August 24 thru Sept 23 Home should be where your heart is as planets focus on your Domestic sector. Socializing and extending your circle of friends should be your #1 priority . LIBRA - Sept 24 thru Oct 23 Affairs of the heart are happily accented by good aspects from your planetary ruler, Venus. Holiday get to-gethers should bring new romances. SCORPIO - Oct 24 thru Nov 22 Be open for new opportunities in times of change. A look backwards may offer clues to what's needed to move forwards. Mingle with optimistic people. SAGITTARIUS - Nov 23 thru Dec 21 Follow up and take advantage of local opportunities that may soon become available. New cycles are beginning and it's time to be optimistic. CAPRICORN - Dec 22 thru Jan 20 . Success comes from six small words "fi nd a need and fi ll it". New enterprises may now demand your focus. You have the ability to succeed. AQUARIUS - Jan 21 thru Feb 19 Favorable aspects in your Money sector should bring support in fi nancial opportunities. Promote what you do best for rewards and recognition. PISCES - Feb 20 thru March 2F0 Problems have solutions! The Universe never locks you in. For best advice "sleep on it" and trust your intuition. Stars work in your behalf. NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD Procter & Gamble announced in October that it will once again create and host a public restroom for the holiday season in New York City's Times Square as a promotion for Charmin tissue. Last year's installation was merely specially outfi tted toilet facilities, but this year P&G will upgrade by hiring fi ve bloggers ("Charmin Ambassadors") to "interact" with the expected "hundreds of thousands of bathroom guests" and write about their experiences with Charmin tissue on the company's Web site (and include "family- friendly" photographs). P&G is calling the campaign "Enjoy the Go." [Business Courier of Cincinnati, 10-20-09] Compelling Explanations "Therapeutic" Sex: The U.S. Tax Court ruled in September that William Halby, 78, owes back taxes because he improperly tried to deduct $300,000 over a fi ve-year period for "medical" expenses that were merely purchases of sex toys and pornography and payments to prostitutes. Halby said the activities relieved his "depression," in that he had no other sexual outlets. The court reminded Halby (a retired New York tax lawyer) that prostitution is illegal in New York. [Forbes, 9-17-09] James Pacenza, 60, of Montgomery, N.Y., who was fi red by IBM in 2003 after he continued to visit an Internet sex-chat room during work hours, renewed his challenge to the termination in September, telling a federal appeals court that his Internet sex "addiction" is a result of post-traumatic stress disorder from combat in the Vietnam war. [St. Petersburg Times-AP, 9-22-09] Robin Magee, a law professor at Minnesota's Hamline University, was charged with state income tax evasion in September for failing to fi le in 2007 and for fi ling returns for 2004, 2005 and 2006 only very recently. Magee told the St. Paul Pioneer Press that she was "unable" to fi le on time because she has "extreme" attention- defi cit disorder. Among the lapses of attention, according to prosecutors, was Magee's claim of eight tax exemptions, even though she is single and has no dependents. [St. Paul Pioneer Press, 9-9-09] Parenting Made Simple: The father of the baby is only 13 years old, but his own dad told reporters in Manchester, England, in October that the kid "will make a good father" and "is taking his responsibilities very seriously." He is "mature for his age" and "knows what he's about." The new dad said he plans to quit school and work full-time to support the child and the 16-year-old mother (though the earning power of a 13-year-old is uncertain). [Daily Telegraph (London), 10-3-09]

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