Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/418554
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman GETFUZZY DarbyConley ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARAMY»Iama40- year-old woman with a brother two years younger. We were raised in a house that had a lot of pornography exposure (initiated by my father — my mother was dismayed). At the age of 10 and 12 my brother and I started behaving sexually with each other. It went all the way. It was consen- sual — it wasn't a case of molestation or anything like that, and it lasted less than a year. I still think about it sometimes and wonder if my brother ever thinks about or feels ashamed about it, like I do. Should I still feel ashamed after all these years, or is this some- thing I need to just forget about? —Embarrassed DEAR EMBARRASSED » Just forget about it? Can you? No. So you should deal with it now. You and your brother violated an ancient taboo without realizing it — because you were chil- dren. You were acting out adult sexual behavior that you were seeing in your own home. Your father's choice to expose you to pornography normalized behavior in your home that should not be normalized among children. As the older sibling, you might have initiated this behavior — or as you got older you might have realized it was wrong and now fe el gu ilty that you either started it or didn't put a stop to it sooner. You should discuss this long-ago behavior wi th a th er ap is t. I suspe ct you have a lot to talk about — including your parents' choice not to provide a healthier home li fe for you. Ultimately you may choose to discuss this with your brother, to put it in perspective and — if necessary — explain and apologize for your part in behavior that has been psychically and spiritu- ally damaging to you (and perhaps to him). DEAR AMY » "Estranged" fears being scorned by society for separating him/herself from an abusive father. I lived for years with anger and depression rooted in an abusive upbringing. I finally found the strength to walk away, completely, from my past — which included severing all contact with my parents. Within months, I be- gan to heal. I've now been free of them for 15 years and I'm happier every day for it. As for social scorn, I was pleased to discover that those who knew me fully understood my decision. The opinions of those who don't know me don't matter. I hope "Estranged" is able to take the steps necessary to be happy — without concern for others' perceptions. — Happy and Healthy DEAR HAPPY » Many read- ers have responded with similar stories. Sometimes the best way to heal from a legacy of abuse is to break the cycle and create a new, healthy life. Pornography exposure at young age has adult woman ashamed You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribune.com and follow her on Twitter @askingamy. Amy Dickinson Ask Amy Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Scorpio(Oct.24-Nov.22) — Muster up a little self- discipline if you want to finish your latest venture. Once it's complete, reward yourself. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Expect to meet with hostility if you haven't lived up to your end of a bargain. Make a sincere apology and do what you can to rectify the situation. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — You need to face facts. You can't please everyone, and you will accomplish little if you try. Don't be afraid to say no if you have too much on your plate. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — You will find the silver lining in every cloud. Your positive outlook will be contagious, and you will get your way by delight- ing others with your attitude. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — A partnership will encounter a roadblock. If you have exag- gerated or betrayed someone's trust, now is the time to come clean. Problems will escalate if you ignore important issues. Aries (March 21-April 19) — If your current routine has put you in a rut, consider visiting some friends. It will give you a chance to catch up on old times and resurrect dormant goals. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — It's time to mix business with pleasure. Don't exclude older or younger relatives in your plans. What you learn will help you make a wise decision about your future. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — People will be anxious to help you out with your ideas. You will get the necessary support if you appropriately delegate work. Be a leader in order to reach your goal. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — You will be quite emotional today. Rather than make a fuss, do what's required to fix what isn't working for you. Once you take action, you will feel more in control. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — Do your best to please others. Spending quality time with the ones you love will give you a better sense of priorities. A family that plays together stays together. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — A current partnership will require delicate suggestions. If you act now, you can avoid pitfalls in the future. Don't allow anyone to distract you from what you should be doing. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — Share your feelings. Never as- sume that someone knows what you are thinking. If you care for someone, let him or her know. Be frank and offer workable solutions. Horoscope By Eugenia Last WEDNESDAY, NOV. 19 WEDNESDAY,NOVEMBER19,2014 REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM |YOURDAILYBREAK | 3 B