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Monday, September 12, 2011 – Daily News 5A FEATURES Delinquent deviating daughter's direction Dear Annie: I have been a single mother for 20 years. Four months ago, I was talked into letting one of my daughter's friends stay with us while her par- ents searched for a new home in another state. They agreed to pay me a monthly stipend for their daughter's expenses. This has not happened. I received one check, and that was it. This girl's father makes plenty of money, and I am barely getting by. I also discovered that the girl has Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar a significant drug and alcohol prob- lem, and it is influencing my daughter. Sad to say, I believe my child is following this girl down the same path. When my daughter decided my house rules were too strict, she packed her things, and she and her friend went to live with my ex-husband. I don't believe my house rules are out of line. I told her no drugs, no alcohol, no profanity, and she has to keep her room clean. Of course, she has not told her father the real picture. She painted me as some kind of ogre. Should I have handled this differently? — Indiana Dear Indiana: Your ex-husband needs to know that your daughter's friend is drinking and doing drugs, and that your daughter may be experimenting, as well. Once she sees that Daddy's rules are not much different from Mom's, she may return home. If not, at least you know she is in a safe environment. Her friend's parents also should be aware of what their child is doing, whether they believe you or not. You can't do much about your missing pay- ments unless the agreement was in writing. But shame on them for taking advan- tage of your generosity. Dear Annie: I have a question about tipping. As a former waitress, I tip any- where from 15 to 20 percent when I dine in a restaurant. Howev- er, I am stumped when it comes to tipping for carryout. In order to cut back on expenses, we are eating out less and picking up more. Are we supposed to tip the clerk for a carryout? If so, what is the standard amount? — Wiscon- sin Dear Wisconsin: If the carryout order is small and uncomplicated, a tip is not mandatory. However, if the person putting it together has to add several condiments, plastic utensils and extra napkins, or if your order is particularly large or complicated, the usual rate is 5 to 10 percent. If there is curb service, 10 percent is the standard. Waitstaff and kitchen help don't make a lot of money as it is, so we are inclined to err on the generous side. Dear Annie: ''Sexually Frus- trated'' said his 30-year-old wife wasn't interested in sex. You listed any number of reasons and said he should get some counseling for himself. But suppose the problem is neither temporary exhaustion nor medical difficulty. For those who would never look for satisfaction outside the marriage, the best answer might be divorce. Before I married my wife, we had a rich, active sex life. As soon as we said ''I do,'' it fell into a drought. I considered all the possi- bilities you mentioned, but after more than two decades and three children, my wife admitted what I had suspected all along: She didn't love me and never had. Three or four times a year, she permitted intimacy and thought that was a great sacrifice on her part, as well as a generous fulfillment of her conjugal ''obligation.'' I stayed in the marriage for the sake of our children, but looking back, I believe we all would have been better served by divorce. Sex- ual satisfaction is not the most important thing in marriage, but the kind of relationship that sex can express is. Now I am old and rue the wasted years and the fundamen- tal happiness I never experienced. — Wise Too Late Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. Whiskeytown clean up day scheduled Whiskeytown Nation- al Recreation Area, the Friends of Whiskey- town, and Forever Resorts are collaborat- ing with local business- es and supporters to help clean up litter around Whiskeytown Lake on Saturday, Sept. 24. Over the last 18 years, volunteers have helped to clear thou- sands of pounds of litter from the waters and shoreline of the lake. Whiskeytown's Pick- up Lake Litter event runs concurrently with National Public Lands Day, which is the nation's largest hands- on volunteer effort to improve and enhance the public lands that Americans enjoy. National Public Lands Day is designated a fee-free day for visi- tors to all National Park Service units, including Whiskeytown. In celebration of National Public Lands Day, Western National Parks Association is offering a 15 percent discount on all book- store items at the Whiskeytown Visitor Center. Participants can reg- ister Saturday morning from 8:30 to 10 a.m. in front of the Whiskey- town Visitor Center, which is located 8 miles west of Redding at the intersection of Highway 299 and Kennedy Memorial Drive. All volunteers under the age of 18 must have a parent or guardian pre- sent to register. Volunteers should wear sturdy footwear, appropriate clothing for the weather, work gloves, and bring a water bottle. After picking up litter from designated areas in the park, volunteers will be treated to a free bar- becue lunch at Brandy Creek Marina. In addition, volun- teers will receive a raf- fle ticket for prize draw- ings and have a chance to find special prize items while picking up litter, all thanks to sev- eral local businesses and individual sponsors throughout Redding. For more information about Pick-up Lake Lit- ter Day, please call Ranger Clinton Kane at 242-3451, or Ranger Jeremiah Hockett at 242-3421. To learn more about National Public Lands Day and other volunteer events occurring across the nation, please visit the website at www.publiclandsday.or g. For more information on Whiskeytown, please call the Visitor Center at 246-1225, or stop by during the hours of 10 a.m. and 4 p.m. daily. You can also visit the park website at www.nps.gov/whis. No flour no sugar questions answered DEAR DR. GOTT: I just start- ed using your No Flour, No Sugar diet, and while it is a challenge, I am working through the first few weeks to get used to it. I have a few ques- tions I hope to get answered. I am a Type 2 diabetic and have already noticed changes in my blood sugar. First, the book says that jelly is not allowed, but makes no mention of sugar-free jelly. Is this OK? Second, I have corn tor- tillas that use only ingredi- ents that are allowed, but I have also found low-carb wraps that have half the carbs, more fiber and more protein than the corn tor- tillas. They also have zero sugars, and the calories and fat are similar. The ingredients do list stone- ground whole-wheat flour, soy flour and sesame flour, so does that mean they are automatically disqualified from the diet? Third, is sushi allowed? Finally, I have been told that many Chinese food dishes contain sauces that have flour added as a thick- ening agent. Do you know any specifics on this at all? DEAR READER: The great thing about my diet is that you can adjust it to suit your needs or wants. As you cut out sugar and flour, you will likely experience some cravings, but these will lessen with time. After meeting your weight-loss goal, you can slowly intro- duce some flour and sugar back into the diet or con- tinue to avoid it. Even during dieting, if you find a healthful alterna- tive such as your low-carb PR I C E SALE Save An Additional $ 50 off Save An Additional On All Lay-Z-Boy Recliners Save An Additional $200 off $100-$ Any Sofa & Loveseat Set Save An Additional $ Any TV Console Save An Additional 50 off $100 off Any Mattress Set Serta, Simmons, Natura, Cannon ($499 & up) Save An Additional All Dinette/Dinning Sets ($499 & up) $100 off 400 Save $ On Ergo Tempurpedic Beds 300 Off On Bedroom Sets Save An Additional $200 off Any Sectional Save An Additional $ 50 off Any Glider Rocker Free Delivery with minimum purchase* 12 Months 0% Financing on approval of credit Furniture DEPOT 235 So. Main St., Red Bluff (530) 527-1657 MON.-FRI. 9:00-6:00 • SAT. 9:00-5:00 SUN. 11:00-5:00 wraps that you pre- fer over a no-flour option, use them. Just remember that moderation is the key. If you con- sume a wrap on Monday, have Dr. Peter Gott a no-flour alternative on Tuesday, etc. Now to your specific questions. Sugar-free jelly is allowed, in moderation, of course. Some individuals have found that sugar sub- stitutes can have unwanted side effects, such as headache, gas and diar- rhea, so they should be used sparingly. As a general rule, flour isn't allowed, but based on my above statements, the rules can be bent. Another alternative is bread or wraps made from sprouted grains. You can also find sprouted-grain cereals, pas- tas and more. Some brands add flour, so it is important to read the label carefully. As for sushi and Chi- nese dishes, I'm afraid I cannot provide a satisfac- tory response, as I do not consume either. Sushi is typically vinegared rice, raw or cooked fish or seafood, and vegetables, so I assume most is allowable. As for the Chi- nese food, I suggest you make it at home yourself so you can control what ingredients go into the making. If you order take-out, simply ask if flour or sugar is included in the dish. Those interested in pur- chasing my books that contain countless recipes can do so at most book- stores or by visiting my website, www.AskDr- GottMD.com, to learn how to purchase them directly.