Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/37467
NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD On May 21, Jesse Robinson either established or tied the unofficial world record for unluckiest underage drinker of all time when he was booked into the Hamilton County, Ohio, jail for underage consumption. According to booking records, Robinson’s date of birth is May 22, 1990. [HamiltonCountyJails.info, 5-23-2011] Government in Action! “Common sense lost its voice on this one,” concluded a Wethersfield, Conn., city councilman, lamenting the local school board’s having spent at least $630,000 to “resolve” an ethics complaint against the board’s chairwoman — all because her son had improperly taken a $400 high school course for free. The town’s ethics board conducted more than 60 hours of hearings over 11 months, incurring $407,000 in legal expenses, and finally voted, 3-2, to uphold the complaint. (However, the ethics board ordered only that the chairwoman reimburse the $400; the school board then voted to pay all her legal expenses.) [Hartford Courant, 6-10-2011] “Science does not trump the testimony of individuals,” said Detroit prosecutor Marilyn Eisenbraun, explaining her office’s decision in April to disregard DNA evidence that the University of Michigan’s Innocence Clinic said exonerates Karl Vinson, 56, who has spent 25 years in prison for rape. Despite the science, Eisenbraun said she had to stick with eyewitness identification by the victim. Although Vinson has been eligible for release for 15 years, the Parole Board keeps turning him down — because he refuses to acknowledge guilt. (Update: In July, the Michigan Court of Appeals declined to order either Vinson’s release or a new trial, but did grant him an extraordinary right to appeal, based on the new evidence.) [Detroit Free Press, 4-18-2011, 7-2-2011] In June, as five young men gathered around the Mount Tabor Reservoir near Portland, Ore., one urinated in it, thus “contaminating” the 7.2 million gallons that serve the city, and, said Water Bureau administrator David Shaff, necessitating that the entire supply be dumped. Under questioning by the weekly Portland Mercury whether the water is also dumped when an animal urinates in it (or worse, dies in it), Shaff replied, certainly not. “If we did that, we’d be (dumping the water) all the time.” Well, asked the reporter, what’s the difference? Because, said Shaff (sounding confident of his logic), “Do you want to be drinking someone’s pee?” [Portland Mercury, 6-15-2011] A 53-year-old man committed suicide in May by wading into San Francisco Bay, 150 yards offshore, and standing neck-deep until he died in the 60-degree water, with police and firefighters from the city of Alameda watching from shore the entire time. Said a police lieutenant, “We’re not trained to go into the water (and) don’t have the type of equipment that you would use ...” KGO- TV attributed the reluctance to budget cuts that prevented the city’s firefighters from being recertified in water rescues. [KGO- TV, 5-30-2011] COPYRIGHT 2011 CHUCK SHEPHERD 22 UCW JULY 27 - AUGUST 2, 2011 WEEKLY HOROSCOPES BY HOLIDAY ARIES (March 21-April 19) You will not advance to your full potential while taking on every task yourself. Success depends on your ability to put your energy behind the most important tasks and delegate the less crucial work. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) You will present yourself and your ideas in hopes of gaining support. You’ve heard that you’re not supposed to sell yourself short. To know where you stand, look into the pupils of your “customer’s” eyes. Stop when it’s sold. GEMINI (May 21-June 21) It is naive to think that dramatic action will change a relationship now. The relationship is like a rubber band that when pulled extremely in one direction has no choice but to snap back to its original position. Moderation is favored instead. Time is your advocate. CANCER (June 22-July 22) It is said that if you discipline children by speaking softly, you will be heard loud and clear. Use the same principle with yourself. Tell your internal voices to pipe down. Internally, be gentle, fi rm and fair — not angry. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) Growing up fast is sometimes the greatest defense against what Shakespeare deemed, “The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.” In some ways, you grew up fast for just this reason. However, this week you will revisit the childhood version of yourself to fi ll in some of the gaps. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) You do not under- stand your own might. It goes beyond physical strength, mental acuity and emotional tough- ness. There is more of you stretching through the dimensions than you know. So volunteer for the hard tasks. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) When you worry, you start to see a negative version of your future. Since visualization really works, when you imagine the worst, it has an impact. You are also brilliant when it comes to conjuring up a positive result. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21) You’re supposed to make a plan, and yet, for reasons unclear to you, you’ll resist. This is your inner wisdom at work suggesting that such plans are futile now. Hold your intention at the forefront of your mind. Things will come together in unexpected, graceful and convenient ways. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) In order to learn, you need accurate feedback. Listen to all the opinions, but don’t act on any of them just yet. Time will be like a sifter. A few days is all it takes to shake out the fl aky or inaccurate advice so that only the truth remains. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) A Chinese proverb says, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” But it’s not until step 233 that you begin to feel like you’re really go- ing somewhere. For the better part of the week, you’ll be trying to create some momentum. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) You adhere to the accepted rules of etiquette for your culture. You are also aware that other cultures have different rules. But when you are around those who seem to have no rules at all, you see the inherent opportunity. You will be an example and a teacher, bringing order and grace to an unruly environment. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) You want every- one to feel at home wherever you are. When you’re in a public place, you are sometimes more helpful than the staff. Your friendly at- titude will bring you good fortune this week. habit is unnecessary or even destructive and do away with it. ADVICE GODDESS The Full-of-It Monty My boyfriend of two years isn’t overtly weird; he’s actually a really nice, normal guy, but he has this “hobby” of going for walks totally naked. We live in Vermont, where this is actually legal. I tell him that women fi nd this upsetting, but he is really turned on by being seen naked by them and has no intention of stopping. Also, he can’t get aroused with me unless he’s been on one of his walks. He says that when he doesn’t have a girlfriend, he masturbates while walking, but because he has me, he doesn’t. Should his nudism bother me? It really doesn’t, but I wonder if it should. — Naked Dude’s Girlfriend By Holiday Mathis Sure, people should do what pleases them sexually — if they’re doing it with other consenting adults. Leaving the house without a blindfold shouldn’t be considered a form of consent. Most of Vermont is clothing-optional. (One town passed a law against it, and I’m guessing there are signs reading “no pants, no shoes, no service.”) But because it’s legal to take your meat out for a bobble in front of the ice cream store doesn’t mean it’s right to force other people to look at it. What’s legal in Vermont is nudism (going naked), not lewdism (going naked with a sexual intent), which is why the latter comes with a maximum of fi ve fully clothed years in a Vermont prison. A sexual oddity becomes a psychiatric Amy Alkon disorder called paraphilia when somebody can’t get off without it and is intensely compelled to engage in it … say, to the point where he’s risking jail time. Sex researchers Masters, Johnson, and Kolodny write in Heterosexuality that though paraphilias play out sexually, the preoccupation isn’t the pursuit of pleasure but fl eeing from psychic pain, as with “compulsive handwashing or the person who must constantly line up all the jars and boxes in the pantry into neat, perfect rows.” Unfortunately, though there’s been some success in treatment with therapy and antidepressants, they fi nd that getting somebody to give up “what he or she deems to be a source of his or her most intense pleasure is likely to be fraught with problems.” The question isn’t should you be dT`WBQ@XXHEHDC@CB@SWD@BGTaDW 'RHQQHTSGTRDX B trvvrxv rsxr str xur! 910.484.6200 bothered, but why aren’t you? Ask yourself what compels you to stay with a guy who commits sex crimes every time he takes a walk. How much of your life is twisted around enabling him and convincing yourself you have a great boyfriend — even as you hear the faint screams of the little old lady down the street? Every relationship has its issues, and many women complain that their man isn’t that present during sex. Then again, that’s usually because they suspect he’s fantasizing about his hot co-worker, not because they’re waiting for him to come back from traumatizing the coffee klatsch. Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM