Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/34231
8A Daily News – Friday, June 17, 2011 FEATURES Parsimonious pop’s pleas persistent Dear Annie: My father is a dentist and earns a good living, but he is going after my money. When I graduated from high school, he took the money relatives and friends sent me and kept it for himself. A year later, he and Mom were going through a divorce, and he subpoenaed my work records to find out what I was earning. Their divorce was finally settled, but when Dad found out I was awarded a partial college scholarship of $980, he wanted ‘‘his share.’’ Mom and Dad both paid for my college tuition, but I worked hard to earn that small scholarship so I could stand on my own two feet. I am frustrated and a little disgusted with my father’s greed. Shouldn’t he feel proud of his daughter’s accomplishment instead of trying to steal it? His true colors came out during the divorce, and I took my mother’s side. Now he apparently has divorced me, as well. I support myself and don’t believe he is enti- tled to my money. What should I do? — Spurned Daughter Dear Daughter: Unless Dad is planning to take you to court for that money, we think you should ignore his demand. It is mean-spir- ited and punitive. Some disturbed and misguided parents try to hurt the ex-spouse by going after the children. We hope Dad will calm down, and while you’re waiting, please consider both legal and emo- Annie’s Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar tional counsel. Your college counseling department should be able to help. Dear Annie: My mother passed away last year. When my sisters put up the Christmas decorations for Dad, they asked if I wanted a nativity set. I said ‘‘yes,’’ and they mailed it to me. I really enjoyed looking at it last Christmas. It was a lovely reminder of my mother. A few weeks ago, my brother decided he wanted that same nativity set and called my sis- ter to see if she knew where it was. Apparently, he had given it to my parents many years before and wanted to take it overseas with him. Instead of telling my brother that she had given it to me, my sister asked me to mail it back. I did. Is there some rule of etiquette about what happens to gifts you give to parents? Is my brother enti- tled to take this back because he was the one who gave it to them? Or can the surviving parent give it to whomever he chooses? It made me sad to return it, because I knew I wouldn’t be able to enjoy that memory of my mother again. — Just Wondering Dear Wondering: When a gift is given, it belongs to the recipient, who can then do with it as he or she chooses. In many instances, howev- er, people who are cleaning out their belongings often return items to the original givers. Sometimes this is appreciated, but not always, and it certainly is not a require- ment. That said, you did the right thing returning the nativity set to your brother. It obviously means as much to him as it does to you, and we are certain that fighting over it would not have pleased Mom. Bravo for taking the high road. Dear Annie: I read the letter from ‘‘Desperate for Advice,’’ whose friend confided that she tricked her husband into getting pregnant. I have a beef with friends who expect you to keep a secret even they don’t keep. My friend’s husband got a DUI and didn’t want anyone to know. But she told a friend, who told a friend, who told another, and now several of us have to pretend we know nothing while we watch the husband surreptitiously water down his booze in order to comply with his probation. That wife has put the burden of her secret on others and deserves to be exposed. — Kentucky Dear Kentucky: We agree that the wife should not have told any- one but her husband. Even so, it is not the business of third parties, and ‘‘Desperate’’ should stay out of it. Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. Sports camp celebrates its 25th year California State Uni- versity, Chico’s Ability First Sports camp, a weeklong overnight camp for youth aged 8–17, celebrates its 25th year this summer. Thirty-five youth with disabilities will come from California, Nevada and Oregon for the camp that will run June 19–25. Participants will stay in a campus residence hall and participate in competitive $320.00 D NEWSAILY in Discount Coupons were published last week in the RED BLUFF TEHAMACOUNTY … And that does not Count all the ads offering percentage discounts, two-for-ones and Free-with-Purchase offers! Don’t miss a Day of it! Subscribe Today 527-2151 It pays for itself. athletics, recreational program- ming, and health and nutrition education. Athletes participate in wheelchair basketball, tennis, soccer and rugby, aquatics, waterskiing and rock climbing. This year, new water ski equipment was purchased through private donations and with the help of HO Sports Company, Inc. In addition to athlet- ics, there are many opportunities for social- izing and making new friends during the week of the camp. Day coun- selors and night coun- selors are assigned to each camper or group of campers, depending on disabilities, and their role is critical in enabling overnight stays and a positive experience. Counselors and campers alike participate in evening activities, including a scavenger hunt, karaoke and a skit night. The staff for Ability First consists primarily of students enrolled in the Therapeutic Recreation and Adaptive Physical Education programs at CSU, Chico. The stu- dents get unique training in applying theoretical concepts in a residential camp setting. Something Special for Dad that Everyone Can Enjoy! Super Sale Time 20% off Traeger Grills FREE BBQ FOOD!! 11am ‘till 7pm Fri. 6/17 - Sun. 6/19 Wild Willy’s BBQ Equipment Sauces, Spices & Accessories 8570 HWY 99E – 1 mile north of Los Molinos !! Bring in this ad for a free bottle of Scorned Woman BBQ Sauce* !! *limited to first twenty requests “In addition to our regular program offer- ings, we have expanded this year to include golf, ropes course activities and a super heroes theme,” said Laura McLachlin, co-director of the camp. “We are so fortunate to have a com- munity, the University and various donors who believe in and support our vision to provide a quality sports camp expe- rience for our young ath- letes.” For more information contact the Ability First Sports Camp office at 530-588-0335. Rare coins Have you ever wondered what those old silver coins in your coffee can were worth? The International Coin Collectors Associa- tion is coming to Corning in search of the rarest coins in world. During this event, start- ing Monday at the Rolling Hills Casino and running through Saturday, special- ists will be seeking items such as coins and paper cur- rency issued prior to 1965 and gold items including class rings, mismatched earrings, broken necklaces, gold coins and bullion. Hours will be 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. Monday through Fri- day and 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Saturday. No appointment necessary. Is stress to blame for sleeplessness? DEAR DR. GOTT: In early March 2010, my husband broke his ankle in three places and shat- tered his heel. Despite the fact that he is now mobile and has passed through the worst part of recovery, he struggles with horrid sleep problems. Each night, he falls asleep almost immediately but is awake about two hours later and cannot fall back to sleep. Needless to say, this lack of sleep is taking its toll on him, as during the day he is completely drained. We have consult- ed our family physician, who has tried unsuccess- fully prescribing various sleep medications. We have also tried melatonin, lavender, chamomile and more. You name it, he has tried it, to no avail. Is there anything else he can do at this point? I also have had sleep- ing problems since his foot injury, but medica- tion is working for me. We were both very much stressed after his injury because he was non- weight-bearing for three months and ran the risk of actually losing his foot due to the severity of the injury. Thank you for any help you can provide. DEAR READER: Given that your hus- band’s sleeping difficul- ties followed a serious injury, it is likely the two are related. Stress could certainly be to blame, including post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), but certain medications can also cause unwanted sleep disturbances. Because you don’t pro- vide a list of what med- ications he is taking (like- ly an antibiotic and/or pain relievers), I cannot determine whether this is a possibility. Because he has unsuc- cessfully tried so many prescription and home remedies, there is little left to recommend. I sug- gest that he review his medications with his physician to determine if one or more may con- tribute to the problem. Beyond that, he should learn some relaxation and stress-dealing techniques. Meditation, yoga, tai chi, deep breathing and more are all beneficial to calm- ing both mind and body. In addition, yoga and tai chi are gentle exercises that may reduce his pain levels and allow him to regain some of the leg strength he lost during his injury and recovery. He may also benefit from counseling with someone Don’t Kid Dad on Father’s Day! Beef. It’s what’s for dinner. Just Give Him Good Beef.! Meaty, mouth-watering beef ribs & steak of course. Cooked exactly as Dad likes ‘em -- smoked over charcoal and brushed with a tangy barbecue sauce. Who could ask for anything more? Beef For Father’s Day... It’s The Perfect Gift. Tehama County Cattlewomen 499 & NuWay Market - Los Molinos Boneless N.Y. Steak $ lb who can help him deal with aspects of the trauma and recovery that may still be bothering him. Dr. Peter Gott Readers inter- ested in learning more can order my Health Report “Sleep/Wake Dis- orders” by send- ing a self- addressed stamped No. 10 envelope and a $2 check or money order to Dr. Peter Gott, P.O. Box 433, Lakeville, CT 06039. Be sure to men- tion the title when writing or print an order form off my website’s direct link at www.AskDrGottMD.co m/order_form.pdf. DEAR DR. GOTT: I am so glad you have your column online, but your “search” function is worthless. I was looking for “restless legs syn- drome” and got an article about menopause, so I tried leg cramps. Again, a totally unrelated article. I also searched “ingrown toenail” and got the cor- rect article, but the bot- tom of it was cut off. DEAR READER: The search-function difficul- ties have been an ongoing issue. We are still trying to resolve the issue; how- ever, it is proving diffi- cult. As it stands, every- thing is up-to-date and should be working, but when testing it out, some searches work and others still do not. It is also important to note that the title does not always con- tain the topic you are looking for, but the article itself will, so you may need to browse it. I ask that anyone searching for informa- tion and past articles use the “Browse by Topic” option. This has recently been updated and is now easier to use, and topics are more visible. When you click the topic, arti- cles are then displayed by date, so you may have to scroll down the page to find a particular col- umn. As for the cut-off arti- cle, that was likely because of the length of the article. There should have been a blue “more” link at the bottom that would have taken you to the full article. Dr. Peter H. Gott is a retired physician and the author of several books, including “Live Longer, Live Better,” “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Diet” and “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Cookbook,” which are available at most bookstores or online. 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