Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/31967
2B Daily News – Thursday, May 19, 2011 FEATURES Grandparents’ gifts generating grief Dear Annie: I have been trying to teach my 20-year-old daughter the value of saving money and staying within a budget. Meanwhile, my parents give her money every time she asks. I am newly divorced and feel it is important for my daughter to learn to live within her means. I have had several conversa- tions with my parents about this, but it hasn’t made any difference. I am con- cerned that if they do not stop enabling my daughter’s profligacy, her future will be ruined and she will be dependent on others for the rest of her life. I want her to be able to support herself. My parents taught me this when I was small, and I can stretch the almighty dollar very far. I wouldn’t be where I am now if I hadn’t learned this, and I want the same for my child. At the moment, I am not speak- ing to my parents. I don’t know how else to make them see how much they are hurting their granddaugh- ter. Maybe if they see this in print, it will sink in. — Undermined in Lewiston, N.Y. Dear Lewiston: Probably not. Grandparents have been known to indulge their grandchildren, but overdoing it is a form of selfishness. It makes the givers feel good, so they continue, even if the conse- quences are damaging. How much bailing out is going Shasta College’s Search Advisory Com- mittee held interviews for the position of District Superintendent/President this past week, and has identified two finalists who will participate in President Forums to which all campus employees and interested members of the commu- nity are invited. The finalists are: • Joe E. Wyse, Vice President of Administra- tive Services at Shasta College (2007 through present). Wyse is current- ly completing his Ed.D. in Organizational Lead- ership at Pepperdine Uni- versity (expected in 2012). He holds a Master's degree in New Testament Studies from Trinity International University, and a Bachelor's degree in Physics from Kenyon College. In addition to his current administra- tive assignment, Mr. Wyse's prior experience Annie’s Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar on? If your daughter is behind with her bills and your parents are helping to support her, they are enabling. This largesse won’t last forever. However, if your parents give her money because she occa- sionally wants something special that she can’t afford, we’d leave it alone. Your daughter recognizes those purchases as gifts and does- n’t count on them to pay the rent. Dear Annie: My daughter recently passed away after a lengthy illness. We are blessed to have had lots of support from friends and family, but I am bothered by the lack of response from her doctor. We have had the same physician for 17 years. I understand that he and his colleagues and office staff might not have been able to come to the funeral, but is it too much to ask for a condolence card? Is there some medical ethic that prohibits this? It will be difficult to go into his office for my next visit. I don’t want to stop seeing a competent doctor, but this situation has me very upset. — Crying in California Dear Crying: It used to be a fairly common practice for doctors to send a condolence card when a patient died, but this is no longer the case, and we don’t know exactly why. Unfortunately, the lack of a personal touch can give the impres- sion that the patient was unimpor- tant, and this is quite hurtful to the family. It might help you be more forgiving if you clear the air and tell the doctor how you feel. It might help him, too. Dear Annie: Although I agree with your answer to ‘‘Worried Step- mom’’ regarding the equal distribu- tion of the annual cash gifts, there is a channel Dad can take to help 33- year-old ‘‘Clark’’ from simply wait- ing for the money. For a minimal fee, an attorney can draw up stipula- tions for how and when the money can be used. I have three sons. Two are driven, motivated and have direction in their lives. Our third has always fought depression and, like Clark, would rather watch TV and surf the Internet all day, with no care about his future. Our directives indicate that the receivers of any inheritance contin- ue their education to at least a four- year degree in any field and be employed. (An exception is made if he loses his job.) It could also stipu- late mental health assistance, because a 33-year-old does not hang around his parents’ home with no direction unless he is depressed or mentally incapable. — Living It in Louisville Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. Shasta College to hold Presidents Forums Wyse includes serving as Exec- utive Director at the Trinity Law School and Graduate School, part of Trinity International University, California Regional Center, from 2004 - 2007. Wyse served in several other administrative posi- tions at Trinity Interna- tional University, includ- ing Associate Dean of Administration from 1998 - 2004, and Director of Enrollment Services from 1996 - 1998. Trutna • Kevin W. Trutna, Vice President for Acad- emic and Student Ser- vices at Yuba College (2006 through present). Dr. Trutna holds an Ed.D. in Adult Higher Educa- tion from Montana State University, a Master's degree in Mathematics from Montana State Uni- versity, and a Bachelor's degree in Mathematics/Theology from Loyola University. In addition to his cur- rent administrative The webinar will discuss what is assignment, Dr. Trutna's prior experience includes an Acting President role at Yuba College for sev- eral months in 2009, serving as Dean of Math, Engineering, Science, and Health Occupations at Yuba College from 1999 - 2005, and serving as Director of Institution- al Effectiveness, Research, Planning, and Grants at Arizona West- ern College from 1998 - 1999. The Forums are sched- uled for Thursday, May 26, in the Shasta College Theatre. Mr. Wyse has been scheduled for his forum at 2 p.m. Dr. Trut- na has been scheduled for his forum at 3:15 p.m. For an update on the President Forums refer to the Shasta College Human Resources web- site. This is an exciting time for Shasta College, and we look forward to community involvement in this important process. Office hours with program staff webinar available The Shasta Regional Community Foundation will be hosting a webi- nar with program staff for nonprofit organizations in Shasta, Siskiyou, Trinity, Tehama and Modoc coun- ties at 10:30 a.m. on Friday, May 20. new or upcoming at the Community Foundation and offer all participants a chance to ask questions or talk about projects for which they’re seeking funding. This is an opportu- www.shastarcf.org. nity for potential applicants to hear questions and ideas of other poten- tial applicants as well as for us to respond to specific questions. To reserve a spot go to Irregular menses a cause for concern DEAR DR. GOTT: I just had my menstrual cycle on my birthday last month and now have it again. Can you please explain to me what’s wrong? DEAR READ- ER: I will attempt to respond to your question in a general manner because you do not provide enough infor- mation in your letter. A menstrual cycle is not the same for every woman. Generally speak- ing, it occurs every 28 days and lasts between four to seven days. Varia- tion in flow, regularity and more are extremely common in young women just starting their cycles, as well as in women approaching menopause. Other causes of abnormalities include recent weight gain or loss, a new rigorous exer- cise or workout routine, a change in birth-control medication, illness, bleeding disorders such as von Willebrand dis- ease, the insertion of an intrauterine device (IUD), uterine fibroids, uterine infection (pelvic inflammatory disease) and the use of specific drugs — specifically, steroids and anticoagu- lants and more. Menopause is the name given to the transi- tion period in a woman’s life when the ovaries cease producing eggs. If you are in your 30s or 40s with irregular, longer, shorter, heavier or lighter cycles, hot flashes, problems sleep- ing, headaches, mood swings, a lack of interest in sex, palpitations and vaginal dryness, you may have peri- menopause, a prelude to menopause. Once a female has gone through 12 months without a period, perimenopause is technically over, vitamin D to your foods or in sup- plements; and practicing yoga, tai chi or other relaxation tech- niques. Dr. Peter Gott I recommend that you visit your primary-care physician or gynecologist to discuss the situa- tion. Allow him or her to help put the pieces of the puzzle together to deter- mine whether you are in the early stages of menopause or whether something else is going on that should be addressed. DEAR DR. GOTT: You receive a lot of requests about knee-pain treatments versus surgery, but I have never seen you mention Syn- visc-One. I’m 80 years old and have had two injections over the past two and a half years. They last a year or more and take effect a few weeks following the injection. DEAR READER: This 2009 FDA-approved medication contains hylan polymers, pro- duced from chicken comb. It is similar to the fluid that surrounds the joints of your body and acts as a lubricant. It is injected directly into the intra-articular space inside the knee and is prescribed for the treat- ment of osteoarthritis pain in patients who have failed to respond to more conservative therapy. A single dose is reported to reduce pain for up to 26 weeks. The theory is not a new one. Hyaluronic acid derived from chicken comb was recognized 14 years ago as an alterna- tive treatment for people who wanted to delay surgery. Because Synvisc-One a woman reaches menopause and is no longer able to conceive. Some women may become symptom-free rather quickly; however, for others, symptoms can last five years or longer. There are a number of steps a woman can take to avoid side effects while going through menopause. They include dressing in lighter cloth- ing or in layers to combat hot flashes; avoiding spicy foods, caffeine and excessive alcohol; adding sufficient calcium and is relatively new, I don’t know its long-term effects. Therefore, I can only thank you for bring- ing it to my attention. It is certainly an option for readers to discuss with their orthopedic sur- geons. Dr. Peter H. Gott is a retired physician and the author of several books, including “Live Longer, Live Better,” “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Diet” and “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Cookbook,” which are available at most bookstores or online. His website is www.AskDrGottMD.com Tehama County’s Personal/Professional Service Directory AT YOUR SERVICE! $ 9900 3 month commitment Attorney Local Bankruptcy Attorney Jocelyn C. Olander 530-824-0288 Free Consultation Payment Plans Available Web: www.jcoattyatlaw.com email: mail@jcoatty atlaw.com A federally qualified Debt Relief Agency under 11 U.S.C. 101(12(A)) Runs every Tuesday - Thursday - Saturday Feet Health Bankruptcy BANKRUPTCY Free information $50/mo. + court fee MICHAEL O. HAYS Attorney at Law 1-800-387-9299 Clock Repair 530-736-7079 Grandpa’s Clocks Jim Paul 20910 Pebblestone Dr. Red Bluff Shelf & 31 Day Clocks Repaired Call for appt. Member NAWCC Cuckoo Clocks, Anniversary, Wall, Clock Repair Orthotic Therapy is our Specialty, also treating all aspects of the feet including Bunions, Hammertoes and Plantar Fasciitis with conservative and surgical intervention. We offer comprehensive skin care products from; FOOT AND ANKLE SPECIALIST 2530 Sr Mary Columba Dr Red Bluff (530) 527-7584 Eye Physician James W. Tysinger, Jr. M.D. Eye Physician & Surgeon Fellow American Academy of Ophtalmology We accept Medical, Medicare & most Insurances Office Hours: Tues-Wed-Thurs 8am-4:30pm CREAMS, SALTS, MOISTURIZERS, GIFT SETS www.aerosilknatural.com SPA SKIN CARE PRODUCTS ALL NATURAL INGREDIENTS Mon & Fri 1pm-5pm For Emergencies, After Hours, Week-ends, Call 530-567-5001 345 Hickory St. Red Bluff Tel: (530) 529-4733 Fax: (530) 529-1114 Advertisement If this was your Service Directory ad customers would be reading it right now!! Call us at 527-2151 For more information