Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/25625
NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD “Tall, slim, facial symmetry,” “good teeth,” along with classic makeup and dress and graceful movement, might comprise the inventory list for any beauty contest winner, and they are also the criteria for victors in Niger’s traditional “Gerewol” festival — except that the contestants are all males and the judges all females. Cosmetics are especially crucial, with symbolic black, yellow and white patterns and stripes (with white being the color of “loss” and “death”). A special feature of the pageants, according to a January BBC television report, is that when the female judges each select their winners, they are allowed to marry them (or have fl ings), irrespective of any pre-existing marriage by either party. [BBC News, 1-20-2011] Can’t Possibly Be True It was a prestigious hospital on a worthy mission (to recruit hard-to-match bone marrow donors to beef up dwindling supplies), but UMass Memorial Medical Center (Worcester, Mass.) went hardcore: hiring young female models in short skirts to fl irt with men at New Hampshire shopping centers to entice them to give DNA swabs for possible matches. Complaints piled up because state law requires insurance providers to cover the tests, at $4,000 for each swab submitted by the love-struck fl irtees, and the hospital recently dropped the program, according to a December New York Times report. [New York Times, 12-17-2010] In December, McCaskey East High School in Lancaster, Pa., established a dynamic new program to improve their students’ educational outcomes: racial segregation. At least three of the 11 junior class homerooms were designated as black- only with black girls “mentored” during homeroom period by black female teachers and black boys mentored by black male teachers (on the theory that kids will learn more from people who look like them). [Lancaster New Era, 2-1-2011] Vietnam veteran Ronald Flanagan, in the midst of expensive treatment for bone cancer, had his medical insurance canceled in January because his wife mistakenly keyed in a “7” instead of a “9” in the “cents” space while paying the couple’s regular premium online, leaving the Flanagans 2 cents short. Said the administrator, Ceridian COBRA Services, that remittance “fi t into the defi nition in the regulations of ‘insuffi cient payment’” and allows termination. (Ceridian said it warned the Flanagans before cancellation, but Ron Flanagan said the “warning” was just an ordinary billing statement that did not draw his attention.) [KMGH-TV (Denver), 1-25-2011] Unclear on the Concept From a December memo to paramedics in Edmonton, Alberta, by Alberta Health Services: Drivers should “respond within the posted speed limits even when responding with lights and siren.” “Our job is to save lives,” AHS wrote, “not put them in jeopardy.” According to drivers interviewed by Canadian Broadcasting Corporation News, police have been issuing tickets to drivers on emergencies if they speed or go through red lights. [CBC News, 12-24-2010] COPYRIGHT 2010 CHUCK SHEPHERD 26 UCW FEB. 23 - MARCH 1, 2011 WEEKLY HOROSCOPES BY HOLIDAY ARIES (March 21-April 19) Something will happen to shake your certainty about what is yours, but this is a good thing. Relationships are particularly tricky — they must continu- ally be built. If you believe that something can be taken away from you, you will appreciate it more. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) It’s in your nature to motivate and encourage. You’ll give enthusi- astic appreciation to someone who craves this kind of acknowledgement from you. It starts a ripple of good will. The result will be far more extensive than you thought. GEMINI (May 21-June 21) You’ll be receiving fantastic information about how to take your career to the next level. Your memory is good, but to retain all of the wisdom and tips you will learn this week, you will need to write as much of it down as possible. CANCER (June 22-July 22) Consider whether the current time constraints are really neces- sary. Take off the pressure. Stroll through life instead of running around. Give yourself more hours to play around with ideas. Try things on before you buy them. Take relationships at a leisurely pace. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) Overreacting will be a danger. This is especially easy to do around children or those who behave in unpredict- able and socially awkward ways. With most of these encounters, it’s better not to take issue. Often, the most graceful move is to shrug your shoulders and move on. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) You will be torn between being practical or carrying on with an impossible dream. You’re better off holding on to hope. This is not because everything you want will happen, but because your life will be all the more amazing because you dare to reach higher. C ADVICE GODDESS Ingrate Expectations LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) You want to do well at a task, and you have a strong desire to suc- ceed. That’s usually a plus. However, this week it’s creating more pressure and anxiety than you need. Making a consistent effort will bring you more luck and benefi ts than any single life event could. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21) There are some things you simply must fi nd in yourself. You know this to be true, and that’s why you choose to simply have fun with your loved ones, expecting them only to be themselves. Your point of view will be contagious! SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) You will mix with an array of personalities this week. You are intent on keeping a good mood going, even if that means letting someone else hog the spotlight or be right even when you know they’re wrong. Your gracious manner earns love and respect. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) The reason you have so many interesting things to talk about this week is because you are living a truly interesting life, although you may not readily think this because you are too close to the subject. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) You will par- ticipate in a project that involves many people and has a large number of moving parts. In the end, you will be a major part of the action. You will click especially well with a fellow air sign: Aquarius, Gemini or Libra. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) It will be chal- lenging to communicate due to the sheer volume of ideas running through your head. You may need to consciously slow down your speech in order to be understood. Write down your ideas, especially on Thursday, when you’ll be downright brilliant. By Holiday Mathis I fear my husband has some disability in re- gard to apologizing. Monday was his birthday. I had a terrible cold, but put myself on enough meds to cook him a wonderful meal and dessert. I felt too sick for sex, so I offered up a, um, very personal massage, but he refused. Later, when I asked for a hug as we got into bed, he said, “I don’t think so.” The next day, he was grumpy and distant. When I fi nally called him on it, he said he was sexually frustrated (despite the fact that we usually have sex three times a week). The following day, he acted like everything Amy Alkon was normal, but I still wanted an apology. I said, “It’d be nice if you’d give me a hug and say, ‘I really appreciate everything you did and I’m sorry for being grumpy.’” He got mad and stormed out, which is typical. The closest he ever comes to apologizing is angrily blurting out that he’s sorry. — Still Waiting R Get the Best Brands - No Credit Needed! 42" Troy Aikman Hall of Fame Quarterback GRAND OPENING Give Us Hulk Hogan Pro Wrestler for Two Weeks! When one week is paid* a Try FREE Enter for a Chance to WIN an LCD HDTV!† Drawing Date: February 26 ¡Inscríbete para una oportunidad de ganar un HDTV LCD!† NEW LOCATION! - Fayetteville 9549 Cliffdale Rd Next to Food Lion (910) 867-1712 The advertised transaction is a rental-purchase agreement.*“Two Week Free Trial When One Week Is Paid” offer applies to the fi rst payment only on new agreements entered into through March 12, 2011, when offer ends. This offer cannot be combined with any other promotion. Ownership is optional. Free-rent offers will not reduce total rent or purchase-option amounts. See Store Manager for complete details. Consulta con el Gerente de la Tienda para los detalles completos. †“Enter for a Chance to Win an LCD HDTV” sweepstakes requires no purchase or rental to enter. Must be a legal U.S. resident 18 or older. Entries must be submitted on or before 2/26/11. Drawing will be held 2/26/11. One (1) Grand Prize - a 42” Panasonic LCD HDTV (Panasonic TC-L42U22 - Approximate Retail Value: $1,364.55). Rent-A-Center reserves the right to substitute a prize of equal or greater value. Odds of winning depend on number of entries received. You may obtain a copy of the offi cial sweepstakes rules by sending a self-addressed stamped envelope to: Rent-A-Center Sweepstakes Rules Request (Dept. RAC), 15851 Dallas Parkway, Suite 725, Addison, TX 75001 by 2/18/11. Void where prohibited. **RAC’s “Worry-Free Guaran- tee” includes (1) Matching Any Local Rent-To-Own Business’s Advertised Price (competing advertised price must be for similar payment, delivery and product service terms for in-stock new merchandise on the same brand and model), (2) Delivery, Set-Up and Service (Delivery and set-up are included and RAC services and maintains the merchandise while on rent; set-up does not include connection of gas appliances) and (3) Money Back Guarantee must be exercised within your fi rst week of possession to receive either merchandise replacement or a refund. 4) Payment Protection (re-rent the same or comparable item you returned and pick up where you left off your payments). RAC0211_GO_UP Humans seem to have an evolutionary adaptation to help us guard against being chumped, a sort of inner police dog to see that we aren’t all give and give to people who are all take and take. When our sense of fairness is violated, we need a sign from the violator that we aren’t idiots to trust them in the future. An apology can’t undo a wrong that’s been done, but because it has ego costs for the apologizer (in admitting wrongdoing), it’s an offering that suggests that their future actions will be more partnerlike than selfi shjerklike. It takes a strong person to admit weakness. A person who’s immature, selfi sh, and insecure clings to the idea that love is never having to say you’re sorry, but occasionally needing to snarl it. A sincere apology involves admitting wrongdoing, expressing remorse, pledging that it won’t happen again, and making amends. Feeling remorse is an especially important element. A person who doesn’t feel bad about making you feel bad has no reason to feel bad about doing it again. You can hope he’ll change, you can encourage him to change (I suggest enlisting a therapist trained by marriage researcher John Gottman, gottman.com). But, because criticizing a man with such a fl imsy ego is like “putting out fi re with gasoline,” right now, probably your most uncrazymaking approach to his little tantrums is laughing to yourself at what a big baby he is. From the “probably nice in theory” fi les, you could explain why an apology means so much to you and suggest making a pact to try to always behave like people who haven’t forgotten they love each other. But, consider whether you want to stay married to a man who dispenses affection on the barter system. Your husband’s having sex with you three times a week — unlike all the husbands who write me, longing to go from zero to three times a year. Yet, one night, you fi nd yourself more in the mood for NyQuil, and there’s your man, standing his ground: “No humping? No hugging. The hug store is closed!” (c)2010, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM R U E N P T - N A V E - T E R L S U E A E