Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/254212
5B Tuesday, February 4, 2014 – Daily News DILBERT Scott Adams PEARLS BEFORE SWINE Stephan Pastis PICKLES Brian Crane BABY BLUES Jerry Scott & Rick Kirkman GET FUZZY Darby Conley ZITS Jerry Scott & Jim Borgman SHERMAN'S LAGOON Jim Toomey ARGYLE SWEATER Scott Hilburn BIZARRO Dan Piraro DEAR CAROLYN » I broke up with my fiance four months ago, and although it was my decision and I'm confident in it, I'm having trouble moving on. I still care deeply for him. He put a lot into the relationship — moved into my house, and various oth- er things one does when completely committed to someone — and I'm hanging on to guilt. I constantly think about how I could have handled things differently. We haven't spoken in two months. I've been thinking about emailing him to let him know I'm thinking of him, because it feels so harsh to have no contact. I'm not sure if he'd want it — he hasn't reached out to me either. I don't want to make things more difficult or confusing. Please let me know how I should handle this. — Broken Up Over Breaking Up DEAR BROKEN UP » When the ex is bad! bad! bad! then you're the freshly liberated hero. When the ex is good, you have to live with being the one who told a perfectly good person, "I don't want you anymore." And while it's certainly no picnic to be rejected by someone you love, there's comfort in having a "bad guy" to blame. I believe we're just not used to thinking how excruciating it can be for that bad guy, to be the one who says seemingly heart- less things, kicks a loved one out of the house and stops calling. Of course you feel terrible and haunted for doing that, even when you know that it's necessary — and brave — to end a relationship that isn't working. All you can do is recog- nize that you tried to avoid causing gratuitous pain. It can also help to remind yourself how you felt in breakups you didn't initi- ate. You managed, right? Learned to smile again? As for emailing him, there's no right answer. It could reopen a wound, but at the same time, it could help him to hear that you feel weird about the abrupt and total silence. Email only if it feels right — and not regularly, or to share your problems, to condescend ("Are you OK???"), or, worst of all, to seek warmth or validation. DEAR CAROLYN » For Broken Up: Right now, you feel guilty over all the things you took away from your fiance by breaking up with him. But don't forget about the gift you gave him by doing it now — freedom from a marriage where he was set up to fail. That happened to me and I have a lot more guilt for keeping the relation- ship going longer than I would have if I had been honest with myself about it early on. Good for you, you did the right thing, even though it's hard. — Anonymous DEAR ANONYMOUS » Yes, yes — postponing this pain only compounds it. I hope you have forgiven yourself, though. Self-deception is harmful, but not deliber- ately so. When is the right time to reach out to an ex after a breakup? Carolyn Hax Ask Carolyn Email Carolyn Hax at tellme@washpost.com, follow her on Facebook at www.facebook.com/ carolyn.hax or chat with her online at noon Eastern time each Friday at www.washingtonpost.com. Sudoku Instructions: The object is to place the numbers 1 to 9 in the empty squares so that each row, each column and each 3x3 box contains the number only once. Answer to Previous Puzzle Celebrity Cipher By Luis Campos Instructions: Celebrity Cipher cryptograms are created from quotations by famous people, past and present. Each letter in the cipher stands for another. NEA Crossword Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Make a point of visiting people who you miss or don't get to see often. Spending time with good friends can lead to better days ahead. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Don't take a financial risk. Joint ventures aren't likely to turn out as planned. Generosity can lead to debt. Be careful how you spend your money. Aries (March 21-April 19) — Don't meddle or take on something you cannot handle. Problems with friends or rela- tives will hinder your relation- ship with someone special. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — Romantic encounters based on chemistry will turn out to be unfulfilling. Evaluate any personal or business partnership in the offing for its long-term potential. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — Consider your domestic situ- ation and make adjustments to counter any trouble you foresee. You can make financial gains if you invest in your skills. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Travel or spend time with someone who can offer you knowledge, understanding and solutions. An exotic destination will inspire you to try something new. Participation will lead to an opportunity. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — You can enjoy life without going overboard. Stick to modera- tion, and you will make a better impression. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Size up your personal situa- tion and make the necessary adjustments to improve your position. Honesty in important relationships should be ques- tioned. Make choices based on your needs, not what someone else wants. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): Disagreements will result in delays. Keep your distance to make it easier to assess a situation. Meddling will lead to gossip that will tarnish your reputation. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Get involved, be a participant and show off a little. The people you meet along the way will add something special to whatever you are trying to accomplish. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Don't question others when you should be perfect- ing your own approach. Focus on getting things done to gain respect and the support needed to reach your goals. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — You need to use caution when choosing whom you want to work with. You can get the most accomplished if you are organized. Horoscope By Bernice Bede Osol TUESDAY, FEB. 4