Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/156651
4B Daily News – Thursday, August 22, 2013 FEATURES Overwhelmed co-worker causing stress Most osteoarthritis to work, she feels secure Dear Annie: I am the enough to vent, and it manager of a small busirelieves the pressure and is ness with one co-worker. therapeutic for her. UnfortuFor the past eight years, nately, it's not therapeutic for ''Sheila'' and I have gotten you. along fairly well. Last year, Please be compassionate, not so much. Sheila has as well as honest. Tell Sheila become lazy, obnoxious that you understand she is and surly. She seems to have a chip on her shoulder, Annie's under a great deal of pressure, but when she takes out and her teenage kids are a her frustrations at work, it nightmare (drugs, shoplifting, alcohol, sexual activi- by Kathy Mitchell makes it difficult to be ties, theft, you name it). She and Marcy Sugar around her. Say that talking about her troubles will help, brings all of this baggage to work and talks about it. I just try to but she should utilize the EAP serget through the day without too vices so that her problems won't spill over onto her job. much drama. Dear Annie: My heart breaks for When it was time for Sheila's end-of-year evaluation, I could not all of these grandparents who write bring myself to give her a better to you saying they have no contact grade than the previous year. Not with their grandchildren. I had the only had the evaluation criteria same issue. After two years of sleepless become stricter, but Sheila had changed. When she saw her score, nights, daily crying and grieving, I she became angry and upset. I asked realized my life was passing me by. whether she had any ideas for her The three of my five children who development and improvement for decided we are not good enough to the coming year, and she said to participate in their lives never grieved the loss at all. In fact, they are increase her alcohol consumption. I am close to retirement. Should I thriving and happy, and now there put the hard feelings behind me or are four grandchildren we do not find someone to replace her? Sheila know. My oldest and youngest daughis a single mom, and I know she needs the job. I am torn. I have ters sat back patiently wondering referred her and her family to our whether I would stop mourning long EAP counseling several times, but it enough to remember that they never falls on deaf ears. — Need Less left me, and that their kids are excited and happy to be part of our lives. Drama Dear Drama: We feel sorry for They call me often, and we visit freSheila. She has her hands full at quently. While I am deeply sadhome and is probably stressed dened that I no longer know my beyond measure. When she comes other children, we should not forget Mailbox those who do appreciate and respect us. My advice to all who are suffering is to take charge of your life. Give yourself permission to be happy, strong and creative. Parenting has no recipe. Other factors helped shape each of my children. I have no idea why some act like we don't deserve to live. But I do know that I am stronger, more humble, more forgiving and closer to those who want to share my life. I am grateful beyond measure. — Finally at Peace Dear Finally: Thank you for your sage advice. We cannot always change the things that bring us grief, but we can change how we respond. We hope your words bring comfort and encouragement to others. Dear Annie: I want to respond to ''Frustrated in Louisville,'' whose husband interrupts her constantly. My husband does the same thing and also believes he is doing nothing wrong. I don't think he is intentionally being mean. I believe it's related to his other symptoms of dementia. Perhaps that lady's husband is also experiencing early signs of dementia. — Anonymous Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. If you receive an IRS notice, here's what to do Each year the IRS sends millions of letters and notices to taxpayers. Although some people may feel anxious when they receive one, many are easy to resolve. Here's what to do if you receive a letter or notice from the IRS: 1. Don't panic. Follow the instructions in the letter. 2. There are many reasons the IRS sends notices to taxpayers. The notice usually covers a specific issue about your account or tax return. It may request payment of taxes, notify you of a change to your account or ask for additional information. 3. If you receive a notice about a correction to your tax return, you should review it carefully. You usually will need to compare the information in the notice to the entries on your tax return. • If you agree with the correction, you usually don't need to reply unless a payment is due. • If you don't agree with the correction the IRS made, it's important that you respond as requested. Respond to the IRS in writing to explain why you disagree. Include any documents and information you wish the IRS to consider, along with the bottom tear-off portion of the notice. Mail the information to the IRS address shown in the lower left corner of the notice. Allow at least 30 days for a response from the IRS. 4. There is no need for you to call or visit an IRS office to answer most IRS notices. If you have questions, call the telephone number in the upper right corner of the notice. When you call, have a copy of your tax return and the notice available. 5. Keep copies of any correspondence with your tax records. For more information about IRS notices and requests for payment, see Publication 594, The IRS Collection Process. For information about penalties and interest charges, see Publication 17, Your Federal Income Tax for Individuals. Both are available at IRS.gov or by calling 800-TAX-FORM (800829-3676). magaged with meds interfere with DEAR DOCsleep. TOR K: My joints People with hurt. Does that osteoarthritis mean I have often have it in osteoarthritis? more than one DEAR READjoint. It is most ER: Your knee common in the aches from time to knee, hip, lower time, or maybe back, neck and your fingers don't Dr. K certain finger seem as nimble as by Anthony L. they used to be. Komaroff, M.D. joints. If you suspect That doesn't mean you have osteoarthritis — you have osteoarthritis, see your doctor. There's but you might. There are many differ- no definitive test for it. ent kinds of arthritis. Your doctor will make the They all damage the carti- diagnosis based on your lage, the flexible tissue description of symptoms, lining joints. Every joint a physical examination is a spot where two (or and perhaps some addimore) bones meet. The tional tests. Prepare for your cartilage in a joint keeps bone from rubbing appointment by making a list of your symptoms and against bone. Osteoarthritis is the the circumstances under most common type of which they occur. Do you arthritis. I am one of its notice them during or victims: It ruined my right after a particular activity? hip and required a total Are they worse first thing hip replacement. Medical in the morning? Your research is starting to symptoms — what they understand what leads to are, when they first began the slow degeneration of and how they've changed cartilage seen in over time — provide osteoarthritis, but we still important clues for your don't have a complete doctor. During the physical picture. In my right hip, for exam, your doctor will example, the cartilage had watch how you move and been getting progressively will look at your joints for thinner for years. I didn't specific abnormalities. know it, because it wasn't The bony enlargement of causing symptoms. But a joint without swelling is classic sign of when bone started to rub a against bone, I had symp- osteoarthritis. The doctor will also move your joints toms — mainly pain. As in my case, the through their range of symptoms of osteoarthri- motion to detect any pain, unusual tis usually develop over resistance, many years. The first sign sounds or instability. Your is often joint pain after doctor may also order an strenuous activity or imaging test, such as an overusing a joint. Joints X-ray. If you do have may be stiff in the morning, but loosen up after a osteoarthritis, treatment few minutes of move- will help you manage ment. As the condition your pain and preserve the gets worse, the pain function of your affected becomes more continu- joints. Most people with ous. The joint may be osteoarthritis just require mildly tender much of the pain medicines. But when time, and movement may a joint is badly damaged cause a crackling or grat- and the pain can't be coning sensation. Some peo- trolled, joint replacement ple have continual joint surgery can fix the probpain that is bad enough to lem. It surely has for me. An Independently owned and operated Member of Coldwell Banker Residential Affiliates. The busiest local information website in Tehama County! 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