Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/13269
2B – Daily News – Monday, July 12, 2010 Kind kitty keeper kleptomaniac? Dear Annie: An old acquain- tance agreed to look in on my cat while I was on vacation. Upon my return, I noticed that the lock had been picked on the door to the room where I keep my valuables. My purses, dressers and closets had been rummaged through. Missing are several antique silver pieces and the contents of my jewelry box. There are dozens of other items I have yet to find. Since my acquaintance is a respectable, churchgoing woman who wants for noth- ing, I find it hard to believe she would do such a thing. I asked whether she had let anyone else into my house, and she said, ‘‘No.’’ There was no forced entry, and no one else had access to my home. What should I do? — Thou Shalt Not Steal Dear Thou Shalt: Report the theft to the police immediately. It’s possible someone else broke into your home and your friend is unaware of it. She may have accidentally left the door unlocked on one of her trips in or out of the house. And she could be a thief or a kleptomaniac. Don’t accuse her. Simply tell her you noticed several items were missing from your home and notified the police. Say you wanted to let her know because they may need her help. Annie’s Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar Dear Annie:My youngest child passed away a few years ago, and it took my husband and me quite some time to find a head- stone perfect enough to be the last thing we would ever buy for our child. My daughter and I cleaned and pol- ished the headstone and put beautiful flower arrangements in the vases we had built on each side. We made sure the flowers were yellow and white. The problem is, a few days later, my mother-in-law took blue and purple flowers and stuck them in the same vase. Although I truly appreci- ate that my in-laws want to bring flowers, I want these vases for my arrangements only. Putting together the colors involves a lot of tears and emotions because it makes me feel like I’m still taking care of my child. How do I respectfully tell my in-laws to stop messing up my arrangements and to instead put their flowers in those plastic vases that stick in the ground? Is it wrong for me to feel this way? — Unsure in Oklahoma Dear Unsure: You can’t help how you feel, but sure- ly you realize that your in- laws are also grieving and want to ‘‘take care of’’ their grandchild, too. They aren’t trying to usurp your efforts. They are trying to contribute to them. FEATURES Hip replacement needs revision Approach this in a spirit of cooperation. Explain that you’d like the side vases reserved for specific arrangements. Ideally, you would allow them to add to those arrangements and feel a part of your efforts. But if not, provide them with a few plastic vases and ask if they would place their flow- ers in those. Make sure you tell them how much you appreciate their assistance in brightening the gravesite. We also suggest you contact The Compassionate Friends (compassionatefriends.org) at 1-877- 969-0010, a won- derful organization for those whose children have died. Dear Annie: I agree with your suggestion that ‘‘Lonesome’s’’ wife should contact the American Can- cer Society, but I believe your response lacked com- passion for him. This man has bent over backward in his concern. As a five-year cancer survivor who has to wear a pad because of leakage and sees the scar that runs from my waistline all the way down, I know what this does to one’s self-esteem. But cuddling doesn’t always lead to arousal, and some- times a person just wants to hold the person he loves. Your assumption that ‘‘Lonesome’’ is only inter- ested in sex is female- biased. You need to cut him some slack. — Living, Lov- ing without Sex in Illinois Dear Living: You are right that we should have acknowledged his patience . DEAR DR. GOTT: I am a 39-year-old male. I had a total hip replace- ment on my left hip in July 1998. I had almost no pain (once it healed) for more than 10 years. Now I have almost con- stant pain and other sen- sations that feel as if the prosthetic is popping out or slipping. My problem now is that the only doctor who will agree to do my revi- sion surgery (the one who did the original replacement) is not a provider with my insur- ance. I have consulted two other physicians, and they both tell me that I need to wait because the plastic ball part of the prosthetic is not worn enough to warrant hav- ing the surgery. At the same time, they tell me that they can’t say for sure what is going on until they open me up. I have had every scan/test and blood test that I know of to check for low-level infections, but all came back nega- tive. There is one other local surgeon I can con- sult with, but I feel he will concur with the other two doctors and tell me to hold off on surgery. I am currently taking 500 milligrams of naproxen twice a day and extra-strength Tylenol along with Vicodin to try and combat the pain, but it is becoming a los- ing battle. Do I just pack it in and have the original doc- tor perform the surgery for my hip and possibly go bankrupt? Or should I wait and suffer until one of the other doctors thinks it is time for surgery? I under- stand that revisions always come with risk and less chance of suc- cess than the previous surgery, but I can’t take much more and am ready to give the proce- dure a shot. DEAR READER: A typical prosthetic hip can be expected to last 10 to 20 years. Factors such as weight and activity lev- els can have a bearing of success. People who play strenuous sports, per- form heavy lifting or hard manual labor, or are overweight are not as likely to have as good of an outcome as those with moderate lifestyles and average weight. You had your hip replacement 12 years ago, around age 27. This is a young age to have required hip replace- ment. You do not say what necessitated this surgery; however, at this point, it is not a concern. Given your level and frequency of pain, I believe that your hip is simply wearing out and needs to be replaced. Your young age is another factor in this decision. You still have a lot of life left to live, and that should be quality time. You are likely a good Dr. Peter Gott candidate for the surgery. I don’t believe that you should go bankrupt in the process of improving the quality of your life, so I suggest you either return to one of the orthopedists who accepts your insurance to discuss why they don’t think you are a candidate, given your age and pain level, or request a refer- ral to the final local orthopedist for another opinion. You may also benefit from reviewing nonlocal physicians who accept your insurance, includ- ing those associated with a teaching hospital or a major medical cen- ter. To provide related information, I am send- ing you copies of my Health Reports “Manag- ing Chronic Pain” and “An Informed Approach to Surgery.” Other readers who would like copies should send a self- addressed stamped No. 10 envelope and a $2 check or money order per report to Newsletter, P.O. Box 167, Wickliffe, OH 44092-0167. Be sure to mention the title(s) or print an order form off my website at www.AskDrGottMD.co m. Dr. Peter H. Gott is a retired physician and the author of several books, including “Live Longer, Live Better,” “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Diet” and “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Cookbook,” which are available at most bookstores or online. His website is www.AskDrGottMD.com. PAID ADVERTISEMENT I For information on participation in Kids & Families call (530) 527-2151 P.A.W.S. (Partners for Animal Welfare & Safety) A Volunteer Program Dedicated to the Prevention of Litters, Not the Destruction of Unwanted animals. HOW CAN YOU HELP? CALL US! 528-8018 Please leave your number we WILL call you back P.O. Box 8908, Red Bluff CA 96080 For information on participation in Kids & Families call (530) 527-2151 P.A.W.S. (Partners for Animal Welfare & Safety) P.A.W.S. SAYS...Some of the Changes.... As mentioned last week there are important changes in our programs during the remainder of 2010. Most significant is recent action taken by the Board to Suspend the Spay/Neuter certifi- cate program as of end of December. This means there will be only two more months of issu- ing certificates..August and September. It is necessary to cut off with the September issue in order to accommodate the three month expiration of the last issued certificates. There is not enough space here to go into detail of this action, but rest assured we do not take our position in this community lightly and we will endeavor to get a news release into the Red Bluff Daily News and on our website very soon. In the meantime, anyone interested please select one of our three available sources of information. 1. This Kids and Family section, pub- lished every Monday in R.B. Daily News, 2. Our phone answering machine messages: 528-8018, and 3. Our website www.pawstehama.com. August Certificate applicants: Please note! The call in date is the 3rd for August only. Remember 9 a.m. sharp to start calling. (not the 1st ). This is Accepting Enrollment for 2010-2011 Kindergarten through Eighth Grade Call (530) 527-7040 Serving Tehama County Since 1970 R H L C O O O H M C M S U N N T I A I Y S C T