Up & Coming Weekly

THIS WEEK WITH MARGARET by MARGARET DICKSON Several weeks ago, I spoke at awards night for the Howard Health and Life Sciences High School, a one-time academy at Douglas Byrd High School, that has grown up to stand on its own. I was honored to have been invited, of course, but more than that, I was astounded by the successes of the 51 graduates. Everyone has a post-high school plan, each concrete, signed and sealed. One girl is heading for a specifi c medical program in the U.S. Army, and another is going into Fayetteville Tech’s outstanding dental hygiene degree curriculum. The other 49 are all off to four-year colleges, including Columbia University in New York City, UNC-CH, NC State, East Carolina, NC A&T, UNC-P and a number of fi ne independent institutions. Collectively, these graduating seniors earned more than $850,000 in scholarship awards. Clearly, something very right is going on at Howard under the watchful eye of Principal Katrenna Rich. Just as clearly, something very right is going on with families behind those young people, and the former reporter in me just had to talk to one of them. Zach Sullivan, 18, is the young man headed to Columbia. As we say in the South, Zach is a long, tall drink of water who has grown up with his mother and father, Maureen and Dwight, and his younger sisters, Cruz, 16 and a rising senior at Howard Health, and Halle who is, as she fi rmly puts it, “almost 13.” Dwight is a long time employee of a venerable local automotive dealer who has just started his own business. Maureen stayed at home with the children until Halle started school and now works in a medical offi ce. All three children are poised, serious and talented performers logging countless hours at the Cape Fear Regional Theatre, and young Halle, as many in our community remember proudly, performed for two years on Broadway in the long-running hit, Lion King. All fi ve Sullivans graciously sat down with me, and took on my fi rst question. “What are you doing so right?” Maureen volunteered quickly that she and Dwight married and then waited seven years to begin their family. Statistics bear out their decision. Established marriages between mature adults give couples a leg-up in facing the rigors and challenges of raising children. Cruz noted that her “parents are still together” which “helped us stay stable.” Statistics bear Cruz out as well. Faith has been and remains important to the Sullivans. As Dwight puts it, they have always had a “spiritual path,” and Maureen wonders how any mother could not believe in a creator after she has had children. The family sings at home and on the road to and from New York, and the fi rst song Zach ever performed was the “Lord’s Prayer.” Did they spank their children? Yes, they did, but it was highly controlled. Three WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM THIS WEEK WITH MARGARET The Art of Getting it Right Rev. Mary Jean     The Sullivans whacks on the bottom delivered by a parental hand, nothing more. Spanking offenses included being disrespectful and lying. The children agreed that it was worse to know and hear a sibling getting spanked than to be spanked oneself. Now that they are older, Maureen and Dwight withhold privileges. The day we spoke, a younger Sullivan was anticipating the return of a cell phone. The offense? Using the term “shut up.” Maureen made sure each child was reading before entering school, and never expected teachers to raise their children. Both parents are in touch with teachers and principals and participate in school activities, both academic and athletic. They may not have logged quite as many theatre hours as their children, but theirs are still impressive. There are no bedroom televisions for the children, only one in a family area where they all watch together. Communication is critical. While Maureen, Halle, and sometimes Cruz, were in New York during the Lion King run, Dwight and Zach made the long drive every second or third weekend. In between the family kept up with each other on that “great blessing,” the cell phone. Something that struck me particularly about the Sullivans is this: They did not allow their children to be negative, and never to each other. Maureen believes “what they see is what they learn,” and it is impossible not to notice how close the three children are. Both girls teared up when we talked about Zach moving to New York in August, even though they are obviously proud of him. Cruz and Halle call Zach their “best friend ever,” and Cruz hopes to follow him to New York next year. The young Sullivans are clearly smart, talented and ambitious, and Maureen and Dwight give generously to nurture their beloved children. They have created and sustained a wonderful family, and I have no doubt we will hear from Zach, Cruz, and Halle many times as they move into their adult lives and careers. As Father’s Day looms, all parents can fi nd truth in Dwight’s wise counsel. Treat your children with respect and hold them accountable., and always say I love you when you leave. MARGARET DICKSON, Contributing Writer COMMENTS? 484-6200 ext. 222 or editor@upandcomingweekly.com. June 16 June 16 •Ladies Night First 200 ladies receive a FREE rose courtesy of Owen and Bordeaux Florists! June 17 J J June 17 •Thirsty Thursday All sodas and snowcones are just $1 June 18 •Wear your favorite Hawaiian shirt and get a free frozen treat! June 20 •Father’s Day Matinee First pitch at 5:05 First 500 fans receive a BBQ apron for Dad. •Bring Your Dog To Park Day Brought to you by Naturally Unleashed! Gates open at 6:00 p.m. • First Pitch at 7:05 www.goswampdogs.com www.goswampdogs.com JUNE 16-22, 2010 UCW 5 910-705-5745 RevMaryJeanOM@aol.com Baseball is Fun! Where

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