Up & Coming Weekly

NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD Computer hardware engineer Toshio Yamamoto, 49, this year celebrates 15 years’ work tasting and cataloguing all the Japanese ramen (instant noodles) he can get his hands on (including the full ingredients list, texture, fl avor, price and “star” rating for each), for the massive 4,300-ramen database on his Web site, expanded recently with “hundreds” of video reviews and with re-reviews of many previously appearing products (in case the taste had changed, he told journalist Lisa Katayama, writing in April on the popular blog Boing Boing). Yamamoto said he had always eaten ramen for breakfast seven days a week, but cut back recently to fi ve. “I feared that, if I continued at (the seven-day) pace, I would get bored.” [Boing Boing, 4-6-10, 2-22-10] Compelling Explanations In January the California Historical Resources Commission formally claimed, on behalf of the state, about 100 items of property on the surface of the moon having been left behind during the 1969 Apollo 11 landing (since California companies were instrumental in that mission and since only the moon surface itself is off limits to ownership claims under international law). Among the items declared are tools, a fl ag, bags of food and bags of human waste left by astronauts Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin. [BBC News, 1-30-10] Nicolas Damato, 20, fi led a lawsuit in March against Media, Pa., police offi cer Matthew Bellucci for false arrest after a 2008 traffi c stop. Bellucci claimed Damato threatened bodily harm (but a judge later dismissed the charge). Damato acknowledged sending two letters to Bellucci’s home, one of which said in part, “God is just, and you will be punished. F you! You are an a------! A f------ a-- ----!” (as the words were represented in the Philadelphia Daily News story). Damato said it was not a threat but that he was merely expressing a “religious” opinion. [Philadelphia Daily News, 3-11-10] Louis Woodcock, 23, testifi ed at his Toronto trial in March that he was not involved in the 2005 shooting of a woman, despite being seen on surveillance video approaching the woman and holding his hand inside his jacket until gunshots rang out. He said he often kept his hand inside his jacket to keep from sucking his thumb, which is a habit he picked up in childhood and which did not go over well on the street. (The jury, apparently not seeing him as the thumb-sucking type, convicted him of manslaughter.) [CTV (Toronto), 3-9- 10] In February, Jesse McCabe, 29, was spared jail time (probation and community service only) for his conviction in connection with a missing $18,000 in bank deposits he was to have made for his employer in New Port Richey, Fla. Police discovered 13 deposits, from a six-week period, in McCabe’s home, but all the money was recovered, and McCabe persuaded the judge that he just hadn’t been able to make it to the bank yet. [ 2-18-10] COPYRIGHT 2010 CHUCK SHEPHERD WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM ARIES (March 21-April 19)If you feel impris- oned by your current circumstances, you’ll only attract more oppressive limitations. You will be liberated by your thoughts and by your power to imagine your ideal world. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) Relax. Don’t let the tense energy of work and social pressure get to you. Your easygoing style will attract the exact people you need in your life in order to keep things running smoothly. Everyone needs a yin to their yang GEMINI (May 21-June 21) You will be extremely transparent to others this week. This could liberate you. The people you love will know you love them, and what could be wrong with that? They will love you back in the way you so deserve. CANCER (June 22-July 22) The writer Henry Adams said, “Friends are born, not made.” You may feel the truth in this statement as you meet someone this week and feel an instanta- neous connection. It seems as though you have known this person in another lifetime, and that you have a lot of catching up to do. It’s worth further pursuit. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) Sometimes, when you get what you want, you are still vaguely unsat- isfi ed. This time will be different. Understand- ing your own motives might lead to a change in your goals. The one you fi nally decide on will lead to happiness. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). The theme this week is: togetherness. The special fondness between you and your people will be highlighted throughout the week. Handle complex problems on Wednesday. Get organized on Thursday, and you’ll be ready for a fantastic weekend. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) You’ll be working with creative people. Do not hand over a job to someone and walk away expecting magic to happen. The magic ingredient is your vision. And your encouragement toward this vision will allow others to expand in ways they haven’t done before. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). You maintain your responsibilities to a high level. If you appear to be working harder than everyone else, you will seem weak. Delegate so that you can get back to being cool, relaxed and in control. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Keep friends informed about what you want and what you’re doing — they can help you. And while you’re at it, give a shout out to all the unseen forces of na- ture and heaven, the mystical deities and anyone else you can think of. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) You often dream of the future, painting a picture of how you want it to be. Use this skill in reverse. By focusing in this fanciful way on your story thus far, you’ll come up with a kinder, gentler way of viewing your past and yourself. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) The person who makes you laugh might not be the same person you would turn to when you need a favor. This week, you’ll have an increased awareness of the different roles people play in your life, and of how you can make the most of your relationships. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) You will be made aware of beliefs you didn’t know you held. Proactively seek out people who are different in order to broaden your awareness and views. In doing so, you will be a proponent of peace and tolerance. By Holiday Mathis Be a ! SINGERS• ACTORS• DANCERS OPEN AUDITIONS Children 5 to 12 Years Old  6-8 p.m. Snyder Memorial Baptist Church 701 Westmont Drive Kidsville Kids have fun singing & dancing their way across the region while developing their talents and gaining valuable experience in the performing arts. They encourage and inspire literacy, good character traits and high values in young people.   www.kidsvillenews.com/cumberland WEEKLY HOROSCOPES BY HOLIDAY ADVICE GODDESS Bodhi Call This man I dated for two weeks is sensitive, spiritual, talks with trees, appreciates astrology — basically, my ideal match. But, I think I messed up, repeating bad patterns: I kissed him first and had sex too soon. He called twice at 9:30 p.m., wanting me to come over and see a movie, but we ended up naked again. I asked him out twice — but only because he often waits till the last minute to decide anything. (I don’t know why one has to play a game of letting the man call.) I also asked if it was safe to open my heart to him. He said, “Why don’t you ask your heart that?” That was the last I saw of him. I called him, and he said he didn’t “feel a romantic thing,” and that I’d shared my feelings too fast. Help!! We had a past life together where I was the man and he was the woman, which he himself mentioned, yet now he’s not even sure we can be friends. — Distressed No. You didn’t. Two weeks in, you didn’t really ask a guy, “Is it safe to open my heart to you?” Forget the old “anything worth having is worth waiting for.” You’re a woman in a hurry. Anything worth having is worth cornering like a trapped animal. Unfortunately, guythink doesn’t Amy Alkon work on that timetable. For best results, you don’t kiss a guy first, you don’t initiate dates, and you don’t chirp “I’ll be right over!” when he calls at 9:30 for a movie date at 9:35. What’s playing? Surprise, surprise, cable’s on the fritz, but he’s got a cell phone camera, and he could shoot you two doing it. There’s much sneering about game playing as a form of deception, but it’s more of a social intelligence test — a way of signaling people that you’re worth having or hiring. In a job interview, it probably means showing up in a dress and heels instead of your bra and underwear and clown shoes. In dating, “playing a game of letting the man call” is how you avoid playing the game of begging him to call after he loses interest. This hoohah about who you supposedly were to him in a past life only helps distract you from how you keep coming back in this one: as a bug under a man’s shoe. Do the work to fill the empty places in yourself so you won’t continue these desperate attempts to plug them with a boyfriend. Only when you’re okay alone are you fit to start looking for company. At that point, “playing the game” will come naturally. You won’t have guys calling at the last minute because you’ll seem like a girl who’d be busy — too busy having self-respect to make like Domino’s and have yourself delivered. Forget whether a guy’s into astrology; it’s whether you have dignity that determines your fate with him — not the fact that you were both born when Capricorn was in 7-Eleven. (c)2010, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. MAY 5-11, 2010 UCW 31

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