Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
Issue link: http://www.epageflip.net/i/635424
FEBRUARY 3-9, 2016 UCW 23 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM ADVICE GODDESS Mr. Swipe Right I'm a woman who's both loving and seriously hating Tinder. Guys on this app mostly want to hook up, and even those who say they want a relationship are flaky, often disappearing after a single date. Sure, this sometimes happens with guys I meet in real life, but not at the rate of my Tinder dates. — Annoyed Tinder takes all the wait and effort out of speed dating. you just "swipe right" on your phone to match with somebody — and maybe even swipe 'em right into your bed 20 minutes later. Unfortunately, our psychological operating system evolved in an environment where the level of choice was more like "Sir, can I bring you the grubs or the grubs?" So research finds that we're easily overwhelmed by a slew of options. Social psychologist Barry Schwartz explains that these problems with choosing are about protecting ourselves from regret — the pain of blaming ourselves for making the wrong choice. But having a lot of options isn't necessarily unmanageable — if we have enough information to differentiate between them and narrow the field. However, on Tinder, there's minimal info — only age, location, pics and a few lines about a person -- making it an endless swipestream of "she's hot" and "she's hot in a slightly different way." Also consider that Tinder is not designed to help you find love (that lasts for more than a few sweaty hours); Tinder is designed to keep you Tindering. The psychological hook is "intermittent reinforcement." Predictable "rewards" — like if you swiped and always got a match — quickly give us the yawnies. But Tinder's unpredictable rewards — the random ding! "It's a match!" — turn you into a coke-seeking lab rat, relentlessly swiping for your next high. You may decide to keep nibbling at Tinder's mobile-global man buffet, but dates that come out of real-life meetings are probably more likely to lead to second dates, and maybe more. At a party, you're, say, one of eight single women, five of whom a guy isn't that attracted to and one of whom he broke up with last year. And finally, there's how face-to-face meetings come with behavioral constraints that Tinder convos lack. Copyright Amy Alkon WEEKLY HOROSCOPES NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD The "public art" statues unveiled in January by Fort Myers, Florida, Mayor Randy Henderson included a metal structure by sculptor Edugardo Carmona of a man walking a dog, with the dog "lifting his leg" beside a pole. Only after inspecting the piece more closely did many observers realize that the man, too, was relieving himself against the pole. Carmona described the work as commentary on man and dog "marking their territory." A recent anonymously authored "confidential" book by a National Football League player reported that "linemen, especially," have taken to relieving themselves inside their uniforms during games, "a sign that you're so into the game" that you "won't pause (even) to use the toilet." [WBBH- TV (Fort Myers, 1-8-2016] [New York Times, 12-29-2015 (review of NFL Confidential: True Confessions From the Gutter of Football)] Can't Possibly Be True The popular Nell's Country Kitchen in Winter Haven, Florida, was shut down again (for "remodeling," the owner said) in December after a health inspector found that it had been operating for two weeks without its own running water — with only a garden hose connection, across its parking lot, to a neighbor's spigot. It had also closed for a day earlier in 2015 because of mold, roach activity and rodent droppings (although management insisted that business had immediately picked up the day they reopened). [WTSP-TV (St. Petersburg), 12-23-2015] Weird News One Can Actually Use: In November, a perhaps-exasperated Centers for Disease Control attempted once again to tout a startlingly effective anti-HIV drug — after a recent survey revealed that a third of primary-care doctors said they had never heard of it. So, FYI: Truvada, taken once a day, said the CDC, gives "better than 90 percent" protection from risky gay sex and better than 70 percent protection from HIV acquired from the sharing of needles. Truvada is the only FDA-approved retroviral drug for retarding HIV (but its maker, Gilead Sciences, has declined to advertise it for that purpose). [USA Today, 11-30-2015] 2015 COPYRIGHT CHUCK SHEPPARD ARIES - Mar 21/Apr 20 A burst of optimism has you moving toward a new goal, Aries. This positive frame of mind can propel you to the finish line quickly, but make each decision carefully. TAURUS - Apr 21/May 21 Taurus, new revelations may inspire you to make some long-desired changes. Write down all of your plans so you can see them on paper and weigh all of your priorities. GEMINI - May 22/Jun 21 An old friend you haven't seen in a while may suddenly reappear in your life, Gemini. This person may take you on a fun trip down memory lane. Enjoy the laughs. CANCER - Jun 22/Jul 22 Expect a change of circumstances at work, Cancer. This change may come by way of a transfer or a promotion, or it might be something less significant. Embrace it in any case. LEO - Jul 23/Aug 23 A close friend of yours may suggest a last- minute trip, and you just may be game for an adventure, Leo. Pack all of your essentials and do not think too much, or you might back out. VIRGO - Aug 24/Sept 22 Virgo, a financial windfall may seem like a great thing on the surface, but it doesn't come without a price. Resolve to be responsible with your newfound largesse. LIBRA - Sept 23/Oct 23 Libra, you might feel nervous at the prospect of a big change at your job, but you are totally ready for the change and some new responsibilities. SCORPIO - Oct 24/Nov 22 Scorpio, some recent nerves and stress may come to an end this week. You feel focused right now and have your eye on the prize, and relief is on the way. SAGITTARIUS - Nov 23/Dec 21 Sagittarius, expect some welcome developments in your romantic life. This may be the week you meet someone new. If you're involved, expect your romantic energy to grow. CAPRICORN - Dec 22/Jan 20 Capricorn, you're ready to spread your ideas and plans to others, but the public just may not be open to what you have to share at this time. Don't force the issue at present; give it a few days. AQUARIUS - Jan 21/Feb 18 Sacrifices will be well worth the effort this week, Aquarius. Keep in mind that these sacrifices are temporary and not that disruptive. The reward awaits. PISCES - Feb 19/Mar 20 Pisces, success at work paints you in a new light with your colleagues. You may finally receive the recognition you deserve. Amy Alkon