Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
Issue link: http://www.epageflip.net/i/514143
MAY 20-26, 2015 UCW 23 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM ADVICE GODDESS The Show Must Go On I've been dating this guy long distance for six months. He'll often fail to return texts for an entire day or even a few days. I keep breaking up with him, but he keeps apologizing, acknowledging that he can be " distracted" and then offering convincing excuses or making me feel I'm overreacting. This is getting old. — Annoyed There is sometimes a good reason your boyfriend can't return your text for days. When there is no good reason, his acknowledging an error, like by admitting to being "distracted," is a first step in mending his ways. That is, except when he shows you — repeatedly — that it's his only step (perhaps because it's tricky to text you back when his other, more local girlfriend is sitting right next to him). Getting somebody to respect your boundaries starts with appearing to have them. Sure, there are sometimes allowances to be made, like for an all-nighter at work or illness. As a friend of mine once wrote: "Sorry I didn't respond to your email; I was in a coma." But a man who cares about you generally acts in ways reflecting that — like by dashing off a text to tell you "sleepy - w/write u in am" or "kidnapped. w/be in touch w/ransom demand." Instead, this guy gives you yet another apology — which basically translates to "Sorry that it'll be a few days before I can do this to you again." To have a caring, attentive man, you'll need to make room for him in your life. You do this the same way you make room for a new TV: by putting the old broken one out on the curb. It's tempting to keep believing the excuses, which allows you to believe that you're loved. Unfortunately, believing you're loved never plays out like actually being loved. The problem is, in the moment, our emotions are our first responder, and reason — that slacker — burrows under the covers, hoping it won't get called in to work. Overriding wishful thinking-driven gullibility takes planning — having a pre-packed set of standards for how you want to be treated and then pulling them out at excuse o'clock and holding them up to how you're actually being treated. This is how you end up with a boyfriend who keeps his word. Keeps it and puts it on his phone and texts it to you — as opposed to keeping it in a drawer with slightly used chopsticks, old answering machine tapes, and a Ziploc baggie of his sister's hamster's ashes. AMY ALKON Copyright 2015 WEEKLY HOROSCOPES NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD Already, healthy people can donate blood, sperm and eggs, but now the nonprofit OpenBiome offers donors $40 for bowel movements — to supply "fecal transplants" for patients with nasty C. difficile bacterial infections. ("Healthy" contents are transplanted into the infected gut via endoscope or frozen swallowed capsules so that the good bacteria drive out the antibiotic-resistant bad.) Over 2,000 transplant units have been shipped to 185 hospitals so far, and OpenBiome allows daily "donations" so that, with bonuses, a donor could earn $13,000 a year. However, extensive medical questioning and stool- testing is required, and only about 4 percent of potential donors have exquisite- enough feces to qualify. [Washington Post, 1-29-2015] The Job of the Researcher California State University Los Angeles researcher Marc Kubasak spent about 2,500 hours (sometimes 12 hours a day) training 40 brain-damaged rats to walk on a treadmill, after sewing little vests to tether the critters, suspended, to a robotic arm. His work paid off, though, according to the February Popular Science magazine, as doctors in Poland and University College London used his procedures to help a man with a damaged spine. (In the middle of the project, Kubasak developed a rodent allergy and was forced to wear a body suit every day with a respirator.) [Popular Science, February 2015] Ironies U.K.'s Bedfordshire Police were searching in April for the thief who ran off without paying for his Jesus arm tattoo at the RedINC Luton studio (to go with his "Only God Can Judge Me" inking on the other arm.) In fact, the shopkeeper also believes the man swiped the equivalent of $1,548 from a cash drawer when he was momentarily alone in the studio. [Luton Today, 4-1-2015] Former Virginia state Delegate Joseph Morrissey, already scheduled for trial for submitting false documents in one case, was foiled in March qualifying for a state Senate primary because 750 of the 972 voter signatures he submitted were found to be bogus. (Morrissey was sworn in as delegate in January while wearing an ankle monitor as part of his sentence for having sex with an underage girl, but resigned to run for the Senate.) [Richmond Times-Dispatch, 3-31-2015] [Associated Press via Virginian-Pilot (Hampton Roads), 1-15-2015] Copyright CHUCK SHEPPARD ARIES - Mar 21/Apr 20 Aries, your sign pulls back this week and you may focus more on the artistic or spiritual. It can be a highly intuitive time of self-reflection for you. TAURUS - Apr 21/May 21 Taurus, if you have been backtracking over past decisions, it's time to look at things again with a clear perspective -- even if that means you need some advice from a third party. GEMINI - May 22/Jun 21 Gemini, you achieve some financial stability this week and enjoy the opportunity to breathe easy. Don't go overboard, but reward yourself for your financial discipline. CANCER - Jun 22/Jul 22 There is much career energy coming your way, Cancer. You may find yourself with more job offers than you ever thought to entertain. This is not a time to sit back and let things slide. LEO - Jul 23/Aug 23 Beauty and balance are brought into your life, Leo. Use the opportunity to brighten up your space with some decorating or a welcome change of scenery. VIRGO - Aug 24/Sept 22 Virgo, you may have more energy than you know what to do with this week. Find a way to funnel it into a creative or worthwhile endeavor, like volunteer work. LIBRA - Sept 23/Oct 23 Relationships will be a major high point for you this week, Libra. Every friendship or romance you have is irresistible and compelling at the present time. SCORPIO - Oct 24/Nov 22 Scorpio, your health and career continue to be your top priorities. You have a sense of urgency to get in better shape. It may be possible to combine your goals. SAGITTARIUS - Nov 23/Dec 21 You are beyond magnetic this week, Sagittarius. If someone didn't want to be your friend before, they certainly do now. Expect to be swarmed with attention. CAPRICORN - Dec 22/Jan 20 Capricorn, others describe you as feisty and fun this week. With boundless energy, you bring your own party to each and every situation. Enjoy the rush. AQUARIUS - Jan 21/Feb 18 Communication doesn't seem to be coming easily for you, Aquarius. You know what you want and can't voice it successfully. Take some time to plan what you want to say. PISCES - Feb 19/Mar 20 Pisces, a major financial event is on the horizon, but you're not sure if it is a windfall or a burden. Only time will tell. Amy Alkon Chuck Sheppard