Goldsboro News Argus TV Showtime
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16 • December 21 - 27, 2013 • Goldsboro News Argus Howell Refrigeration Allen Horton U N E R A L & 1DSL0813D© 919-759-1004 (O) • 919-222-1974 (C) F Late laughs H O M E C REMATORY A/Paul Murphy Featuring Eastern NC's Most Lube B/Retro Unique Waiting Area 2 x 2" Howell Funeral Traditional Funerals • Pre-Need Planning Cremation Options • Shipping & Receiving 2 x All Pre-arrangements Honored 2" On Site Crematory & EXCLUSIVE PET CREMATORY 24DCT0913S© Commercial & Industrial A/David Henry Buick GMC Supermarket • Ice Machines B/Eastern Fridge New & Used Equipment Sales, Service & Equipment Leasing 2 x 2" 1500 Wayne Memorial Dr., Goldsboro www.howellfuneral.com • 731-7490 Stephen & Heather Howell Sudoku 2DCT0913L© Eastern AN OIL CHANGE YOU WILL NEVER FORGET! 919.735.8019 1000 9th Street • Beside Dairy Queen • Off Wayne Memorial Drive Monday-Friday 8:00am-6:00pm • Saturday 8:00am-4:00pm I Need Immediate Care! Conan: Conan O'Brien The Late Show: The Canadian government has ruled that its doctors are no longer allowed to prescribe heroin. Folks, I think the real story here is that, until recently, in Canada a doctor could give you heroin! David Letterman President Obama's approval rating is at 37 per cent, the lowest point of his presidency. Here's how bad it is: you know the Thanksgiving turkey he's pardoning this week? The turkey said, "No pictures." It didn't want to be seen. This year, Thanksgiving and the first day of Hanukkah are on the same day. I'm no theologian, but I think what that means is eight days of leftovers. 580-0004 Monday-Friday 8:30am-8pm Saturday 8:30am-5pm Sunday 12pm-5pm Across from the Hospital Thanksgiving is the best. I was so pleased last year. Things were going great, having a lot of fun, the house was full of people, everybody getting along — and then I realized that I had picked up the wrong family at the airport. www.immediatecareofgoldsboro.com Fill in the grid so that every row, every column, and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1 through 9. Solution on page 13 Jimmy Kimmel Live: Jimmy Kimmel Delight Everyone on your list! Let us caтr your A/Mt. Olive Therapy Holiday Party! B/Subway 3 x 2" 38DCT0112L© A/Fasteners Supply B/Immediate Care 1 x 4.5" Subway® Gift Cards OFFICE PARTIES • FAMILY GATHERING SCHOOL FUNCTIONS AND PARTIES 5 $ 00 & up 101 WEST PATETOWN ROAD 919.739.9144 SUBWAY® is a registered trademark of Doctor's Associates Inc.©2012 Doctor's Associates Inc.09.454493.12 Thanksgiving travel will be especially unpleasant because of the big storm. More than 500 flights out of Dallas-Fort Worth were canceled. I think this is God's way of saying, "Stay home and overcook your own turkey." It's a big night tonight — the finale of "Dancing with the Stars." I don't know if you've been following the show, but the comedian was eliminated. Bill had the grace and easy elegance of a squirrel getting electrocuted. Late Night With Jimmy Fallon: Jimmy Fallon They're saying a major winter storm is heading east, which could affect millions of Americans on the busiest travel day of the year. Bad news is, We assist in the filing of Chapters 7 and 13 Bryant & bankruptcies and offer debt relief assistance to area Horton PA residents. We have the experience and knowledge 1 x 4.5" as bankruptcy specialists to help you get your finances back on track. We are a debt relief agency and help people file bankruptcy. Bryant & Horton, P.A. 33DSP0913J The Tonight Show: Jay Leno Bankruptcy? 141DCT1113L© President Obama admitted that the health-care rollout was a fiasco. He blamed himself and admitted he is not a perfect president. Today, Fox News named him employee of the month. Are you aware of the turkey shortage? Now the White House has stepped in so people won't panic. They said yes, there's a turkey shortage, but don't worry, it's only a website problem. 202 S. William St. Goldsboro, NC 27533 919.736.0408 you won't get to break the wishbone with your relatives this year. The good news is that's probably the wish you made last year. President Obama just can't catch a break. He gave an immigration speech yesterday in San Francisco and got heckled by a guy yelling something about stopping deportations. Obama was cool. He said the man was entitled to free speech, and then he turned to his security and said, "Deport that guy."