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Looking for love in all the app places We want to feel optimistic, not expect the worst. So it makes sense to prepare for a successful dating experience with someone you meet online. – Marcia Naomi Berger relationship book author Start with coffee or short visit dates and if you feel comfortable, move on to more extended time together. The idea is to be sensible without going too far overboard on caution. You don't want to look like a deer frightened by headlights. – Photos by istock/Getty images Which site should you use? The consensus is that paid dating websites are much more likely to attract quality singles who are interested in creating meaningful, lasting relation- ships. But it still can be worth trying a free site, as long as you're willing to spend more time sorting out people you might want to get to know from the ones with red flags. Here are some highly ranked sites for singles over 60: n Zoosk is a leading online dating brand in the United States, claims over 35 million members, and looks at behavioral tendencies of each registered member to find suitable matches. Like many dating apps, it lets you filter your search to find the type of people you're seeking to meet. n Match.com is similar to Zoosk. It's large and open to anyone in the world. As in most sites, you can specify the age range, religion and other qualities that may be important to you. n OurTime is a dating site specifically geared to- ward active, mature singles seniors looking for a serious, meaningful relationship. n SilverSingles is exclusive to senior singles. Each member takes a personality test that helps the site learn about you, your likes, preferences and more to help match you with other like-minded singles in your location and age range. n SeniorMatch is not dedicated exclusively to online dating but boasts a large membership and has been around since 2003. n Elite Singles is a serious dating site for seniors with a high success rate. It offers matches based on detailed questionnaires. n JDate is a popular site for Jewish people of all ages whose faith is important to them in a marriage or relationship partner. I know of several marriages of people who first met via Jdate. n Christian Mingle claims the largest number of Christians and provides several types of quizzes and tests to help you determine what you're looking for besides someone who shares your beliefs. How to stay safe Although sites may do what they can to prevent false representations, there is no way to ensure that people are who they claim to be. As ICF-certified life coach and dating expert Treva Brandon Scharf states, staying safe when dating online applies to all ages, especially to women over 50, who "can also be more lonely and vulnerable, and prone to scams and cons." Don't get fooled, she says. "If a man sounds too good to be true, he probably is," she says. She warns women, though men also can benefit from her advice, including to watch out for red flags, A Marketing Supplement of the Marin Independent Journal | marinij.com Senior Style October 17, 2021 19