Senior Style

Q and A with Marinites committed to service Continued from previous page which I was ill prepared to be in. Sheila believed and saw in me when others did not. I got that promotion because of Shelia O'Conner but most importantly, I've treasured the lessons I learned from Sheila. If you could go back to any age, what would it be and why? I think my 19th year was my most profound. I naively participated in a college foreign studies program to a country I didn't pick, with a language I didn't know, to a place I had never heard of. I was all about adventure. I ended up in Aix-en- Provence, France with my pet dove. I lived with a French landlady who wasn't French, Algerian, who didn't speak a word of English and hated men. She wasn't too happy with my dove either. I had to learn how to say everything. I went to countries where nobody knew I was there. Communist Yugoslavia, ruled by Dictator Tito, was a real eye-opener. That crazy juncture changed my life and showed me the world beyond my Midwestern Great Plains. Lou Bartolini, Novato What are the most important lessons you've learned? That family, extended family members and friends bring a never- ending purpose and sometimes challenges to life. That honesty and caring in your dealings with people will bring great long-lasting satisfaction and peace of mind. That continuing involvement and concern of your community, even if at different levels as you age, is important to the mind and spirit. When I went to serve in the Korean War and was stationed in Virginia I witnessed my first experience with segregation as to people of color. And it was a shock to me and hard to understand as just a few years earlier I was delivering groceries to many customers in the Hunter's Point projects without a thought as to their color. Who has influenced you most? My parents migrated from France in the 1920s and brought with them a sense of old world values which they passed on to me. Being born in the depth of the Depression forced on me certain values that have remained with me throughout the years. Two Jesuit priests, mentors during my high school and college years, instilled in me the importance of service, religious faith, loyalty, charity, ethical commitment, caring and reminding me of the importance of the common good. My late wife of 34 years and my present wife of 30 years for their understanding, support, fond memories and I'm sure instances of forgiving. If you could go back to any age, what would it be? Although very difficult to select and prioritize I would say my early-mid 40s (the mid-late 70s) where my four children were rapidly growing into adulthood. The summers we spent at Lake Tahoe, coaching Little League or our 4-wheel trips to Baja, California were all truly wonderful family occasions whose memories linger to this day. But it was also a time of tragedy as our 21-year-old daughter died suddenly of a brain aneurysm in 1977 and just 10 years later witnessed the loss of my wife to cancer. Both massive stumbling blocks to one's life, which fortunately in time the happy and pleasant old memories remain as new ones are created. Beth Fernbacher, Corte Madera What are the most important lessons you've learned? Try new challenges even if you might fail. Great times don't come taking it easy but it's always worth it! I sacrificed a more social life when I played competitive tennis but I wouldn't trade what I missed for what I experienced. Who has influenced you most? I don't have one person that was my only influencer. I have been and continue to be influenced by many people including: family members, teachers, coaches, bosses, colleagues and friends. If I had to choose, I would pick my parents. They taught me a strong work ethic and to always do our best and be kind to others. They encouraged us to help others and led by example. My dad worked hard to support the family and to make everyone smile. My mom was focused, curious, helpful to others and also fairly strict! They allowed us to try new things. They helped others often and contributed to society and involved us while doing so. When I was young, I didn't realize that they were teaching/influencing me but over the years, they were great influencers/role models. If you could go back to any age, what would it be? Twenty years old – I miss the college days. The university life involves learning every day, experiencing new things and a lot of exciting physical activity. I liked the variety and the energy when attending a university. And walking or biking everywhere because that was the transportation since most of us did not have cars or places to park them. It was a very freeing and growing experience. n Lou Bartolini "Honesty and caring in your dealings with people will bring great long- lasting satisfaction and peace of mind. " Beth Fernbacher "Great times don't come taking it easy, but it's always worth it! I sacrificed a more social life when I played competitive tennis, but I wouldn't trade what I missed for what I experienced. " A Marketing Supplement of the Marin Independent Journal | marinij.com Senior Style October 17, 2021 13

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